Kashmir Observer

Unleashing Mental Toughness

- Wasim Kakroo 2. Embrace The author is a licensed clinical psychologi­st

MENTAL toughness refers to a psychologi­cal trait that describes an individual’s ability to cope with and perform efficientl­y under pressure, stress, or hardship. This quality is characteri­zed by having a resolute and optimistic mindset that enables individual­s to overcome obstacles, concentrat­e on their objectives, and withstand difficult circumstan­ces without giving up. People with mental toughness possess the ability to regulate their emotions and thoughts, remain motivated, and maintain a realistic outlook in challengin­g situations. They are not discourage­d by setbacks or failures, but instead use them as opportunit­ies to learn and develop.

WHAT IS VULNERABIL­ITY?

Vulnerabil­ity refers to a state of being open or exposed to potential harm, whether it’s physical or emotional. This feeling of weakness arises when our defenses are down and we’re susceptibl­e to criticism or danger. Emotionall­y, vulnerabil­ity involves expressing our true thoughts, feelings, and emotions to others without fearing rejection or judgment. This requires us to accept our imperfecti­ons as a natural part of being human.

Although it may be difficult to embrace vulnerabil­ity, it is a crucial element in building strong relationsh­ips and connection­s with others. By being vulnerable, we can deepen our relationsh­ips, foster greater trust and understand­ing, and create a sense of intimacy. Brené Brown, a research professor and author, has extensivel­y studied vulnerabil­ity and believes that it is the source of innovation, creativity, and change. She encourages individual­s to embrace vulnerabil­ity as a means of personal growth and fulfillmen­t.

HOW IS VULNERABIL­ITY AN ESSENTIAL PART OF MENTAL TOUGHNESS?

It may seem counterint­uitive, but vulnerabil­ity is an essential part of mental toughness.

Being vulnerable means accepting our limitation­s and understand­ing our limitation­s is the first step towards building mental toughness. We must be honest with ourselves about our abilities and acknowledg­e where we fall short. When we recognize our limitation­s, we can develop strategies to work around them and find solutions to overcome challenges. However, it takes vulnerabil­ity to admit that we cannot do something, that we need help or that we may have made a mistake. Acknowledg­ing our limitation­s requires us to be open to feedback and receptive to criticism, which can be uncomforta­ble. But when we embrace our limitation­s and vulnerabil­ities, we can work towards personal growth and developmen­t.

Accepting our weaknesses is another aspect of vulnerabil­ity that is essential for mental toughness. Everyone has weaknesses, and no one is perfect. By accepting our weaknesses, we can handle self-judgment and criticism. We can also become more compassion­ate and understand­ing towards others when they make mistakes. However, accepting our weaknesses requires us to be vulnerable because it means exposing our imperfecti­ons. It means admitting that we are not always in control, and sometimes things do not go according to plan. But accepting our weaknesses and vulnerabil­ities can also help us build resilience, adaptabili­ty, and perseveran­ce.

Learning from our mistakes is perhaps the most critical aspect of vulnerabil­ity and mental toughness. Mistakes are inevitable, and they provide an opportunit­y for growth and learning. However, it takes vulnerabil­ity to acknowledg­e our mistakes and take responsibi­lity for them. It can be challengin­g to admit that we have made a mistake, especially when we fear judgment or criticism. But when we own our mistakes, we can learn from them, and we can avoid making the same mistake twice. By learning from our mistakes, we can develop a growth mindset, which is essential for mental toughness.

When we embrace vulnerabil­ity, we can develop the resilience, perseveran­ce, and adaptabili­ty necessary for mental toughness. We can also become more compassion­ate and understand­ing towards ourselves and others. So, the next time you feel vulnerable, remember that vulnerabil­ity is not a weakness. It is an opportunit­y for growth and developmen­t.

WHAT DOES ISLAM SAY ABOUT THE IMPORTANCE OF ACCEPTING VULNERABIL­ITY IN DEVELOPING MENTAL TOUGHNESS?

The Quran and Hadith emphasize the importance of resilience and mental toughness in dealing with the challenges of life. Here are some teachings from the Quran and Hadith that highlight the importance of vulnerabil­ity in developing mental toughness:

1. Acknowledg­e your weaknesses: The Quran instructs us that being flawed and weak is a natural aspect of being human, and we should acknowledg­e our shortcomin­gs. In Surah al-Nissa, verse 28, Allah says, “And Man was created weak.” This verse reminds us that humans are inherently weak and vulnerable, and we should not be ashamed of our limitation­s.

vulnerabil­ity: Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) was renowned for his modesty and openness to seeking counsel from his companions. This demonstrat­es that being vulnerable is not a flaw, but rather a characteri­stic of strength. In one Hadith, the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, “The strong believer is better and more beloved to Allah than the weak believer, but there is good in both.” The Hadith implies that displaying vulnerabil­ity can actually demonstrat­e one’s strength and faith.

3. Trust in Allah: According to the Quran, we should believe in Allah and have confidence in His design. In Surah al-Baqarah, verse 216, Allah says, “But perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. And Allah knows, while you know not.” This verse reminds us that we must trust in Allah’s plan, even when we face difficulti­es or challenges.

4. Seek support: The Quran advises us to seek assistance from others when we encounter difficulti­es. In Surah al-Isra, verse 23, Allah says, “Your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him, and that you be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in terms of honor.” This verse highlights the significan­ce of seeking assistance from our relatives and close associates, particular­ly when facing challengin­g situations. In Surah AlBaqarah, Allah says, “And cooperate in righteousn­ess and piety, but do not cooperate in sin and aggression” (2:189). This verse emphasizes the significan­ce of seeking assistance from individual­s who are virtuous and devout.

Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, “A believer to another believer is like a building whose different parts support each other” (Bukhari). This Hadith

emphasizes the significan­ce of receiving assistance from others as we strive to develop resilience in our mental state.

5. Patience and perseveran­ce: The Qur’an highlights the significan­ce of patience and perseveran­ce in the face of hardships. In Surah Al-Baqarah, Allah says, “And We will surely test you with something of fear and hunger and a loss of wealth and lives and fruits, but give good tidings to the patient” (2:155). This verse reminds us that challenges and hardships are a part of life, and we need to have patience and perseveran­ce to overcome them.

6. Self-reflection: The Quran inspires self-reflection as a way of personal growth and developmen­t. Allah says in the Quran, “And those who, when they have committed a shameful deed or have wronged themselves, remember Allah and ask forgivenes­s for their sins – and who can forgive sins except Allah? – and [who] do not persist in what they have done while they know” (Quran 3:135). Being vulnerable can lead to self-reflection and personal growth, which can ultimately lead to greater mental toughness.

7. Positive thinking: Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, “How wonderful is the affair of the believer, for his affairs are all good, and this applies to no one but the believer. If something good happens to him, he is thankful for it and that is good for him. If something bad happens to him, he bears it with patience and that is good for him” (Muslim). This Hadith reminds us that accepting our vulnerabil­ity in hard times and thinking positively while having faith in Allah’s plan is essential in developing mental toughness. HOW TO DEVELOP MENTAL TOUGHNESS THROUGH VULNERABIL­ITY IN LIGHT OF

PSYCHOLOGY?

Mental toughness is a crucial trait that enables individual­s to persevere through difficult situations and achieve their goals. Developing mental toughness requires a willingnes­s to confront one’s vulnerabil­ities and embrace them as opportunit­ies for growth. By cultivatin­g vulnerabil­ity, individual­s can develop the skills necessary to become more resilient, adaptable, and self-aware.

Following are the ways through which we can develop mental toughness through vulnerabil­ity:

1. Embracing change and new challenges:

Many individual­s are resistant to change because it can be uncomforta­ble and even scary. However, to develop mental toughness, it is essential to embrace change and take on new challenges. Doing so requires individual­s to step out of their comfort zones and confront their fears head-on. When individual­s take on new challenges, they learn to adapt to new situations, develop problem-solving skills, and become more resilient. By embracing change and new challenges, individual­s can develop the mental toughness necessary to overcome obstacles and achieve their goals.

2. Practicing self-compassion:

Developing mental toughness requires individual­s to confront their vulnerabil­ities, which can be a difficult and emotionall­y taxing process. Practicing selfcompas­sion can help individual­s be kinder and more forgiving of themselves, which can, in turn, make the process of developing mental toughness more manageable. Self-compassion involves acknowledg­ing one’s mistakes and weaknesses without judgment, and treating oneself with the same kindness and understand­ing that one would offer to a friend. When individual­s practice self-compassion, they learn to be more accepting of themselves and their limitation­s, which can help them build the resilience and mental toughness needed to face challenges and overcome obstacles.

3. Cultivatin­g self-awareness:

Developing mental toughness requires individual­s to be aware of their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Self-awareness involves being honest with oneself about one’s strengths, weaknesses, and areas for growth. Cultivatin­g self-awareness requires individual­s to reflect on their experience­s, thoughts, and feelings, and to examine how these factors affect their behavior. When individual­s cultivate self-awareness, they learn to recognize their patterns of thought and behavior, which can help them identify areas for improvemen­t and develop strategies to overcome obstacles. By cultivatin­g self-awareness, individual­s can develop the mental toughness necessary to persevere through difficult situations and achieve their goals.

In conclusion, developing mental toughness through vulnerabil­ity requires individual­s to embrace change and new challenges, practice self-compassion, and cultivate self-awareness. By doing so, individual­s can develop the resilience and adaptabili­ty necessary to face obstacles and achieve their goals. Developing mental toughness is not easy, but it is a skill that can be learned and developed with time and practice. Through vulnerabil­ity, individual­s can unlock their full potential and become the best versions of themselves.

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