Problems Galore

Fear Factor

My father works in the army. He is constantly travelling. To be able to meet him as often as possible, we have to travel extremely often. Whether it is for the weekend or even just a day. I love my father a lot and cannot manage without meeting him at least as often as we do now. However, I do get anxious when we are flying in the aircraft. At first it was mild but just kept increasing. I cannot pinpoint the cause of it increasing so much. How can I overcome this fear of mine because it cause a lot of inconvenience to everyone around me and also makes me feel very weak? Ans: try to understand what exactly it is that you are afraid of while flying so you can work out the problem. You should also try to distract yourself with movies, music and talking to those around you. Try to sleep and think of how at the end of the flight you get to see your father and positive emotions will overpower your fear.

That Awkward Moment

I am friends with a guy from school. We are relatively close. I do not like him and he doesn’t like me either to start a relationship. My friends tease us together because they think that we are in a relationship. That’s what it seems like to everyone. This playful mocking by everyone makes it weird between us and awkward for some time. None of them will stop teasing us so I want to talk to him about it and figure it out. How to do that and what to say?

Ans: sit down with your friend one on one and tell him how much this friendship means to you. Explain to him how all the teasing makes you feel and come up with a plan wherein both of you can counteract the teasing with humor and sarcasm. Get in on it rather than feeling like a victim. Play along, it won’t be as enjoyable to your friends if it doesn’t seem to be getting a reaction from you.

Troubled Friendship

One of my old friends shifted to Dubai a long time ago. She used to come here often as her parents had work here. However, now she is shifting to Spain and has little prospect of coming back here. We won’t get to meet her as often. One of my new friends who I’m also very close to feels left out as she is not friends with my old friend. I am trying to spend as much time with her as she is leaving so I won’t see her. Therefore, I haven’t met her in very long. She thinks that I only talk to her when I have no other company. How should I convey to her that I am equally close to her and I am not just using her at all?

Ans: It is important that you spend time with your old friend as she is leaving, but you can take your new friend along and make them interact as well. Try to take out atleast sometime for your new friend as well as she is going to be there for you when your old friend is gone. Try to understand and validate her feelings and express how much you care.

A Concerned Friend

One of my friends at school seems very upset all the time. He is always by himself in the corner of the class. His parent’s are getting separated soon. I think that he is not being able to handle the pain too well. He is usually very strong but he has cried in front of me and I don’t know what to do. He seems to be slipping into depression as he is not talking to anyone, does not want to leave him house, he has lost his appetite and is unwilling to see a doctor. His parents haven’t properly noticed yet as they are probably dealing with their own problems. Is there absolutely anything that I can do for him and make him feel better?

Ans: since he has been able to cry in front of you means that he is comfortable around you. Take him out, distract him, make him feel like with you he has a safe space and if you are very worried as him if he would like to get help or talk to someone about it.