I want to break free and say I am a queer

Frankly, I don’t know how to react to the decision. If I look at the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer (LGBTQ) community at large, I am really happy. At least I will not have to plead my case to myself anymore. I am absolutely relieved at the Supreme Court's decision that it is not a crime being gay. But if I look at it personally, I still have my parents to deal with.

It is just a matter of a few years after which parents would either start looking for a girl for me or would prod me to find one. I cannot accept either of it. And I am sure they cannot accept my version of the story. It is beyond their imagination. My parents would change the television channel even if there was a kissing scene between a man and a woman. My parents would shatter and probably die inside if they come to know about me.

Coming from a conservative family, I don't know how to muster the courage to tell this to my parents or even my friends. My friends would understand at some point, although I cannot be sure of that as well. People can understand other's sexual preferences, but they cannot accept it if it is of someone close to them.

It has been a struggle even in my short span of 19 years. There is always a fear that something is wrong, even if it really is not. From the society's prism, I am a 'different' person; or an alien for that matter. It becomes difficult to stay in the crowd and yet feel secluded. I came to know of my sexual preferences around six years back; when I was 13. Even though I was not supposed to, I did feel different from others. But this decision has taken a big chunk of pressure off me. I want to come out of the closet and declare that I am here, and I am queer. Next step, informing parents.