Dating

SIX EASY STEPS TOWARD CREATING A DATING PROFILE THAT WILL HELP YOU WIN A CHANCE AT TRUE LOVE

Six easy steps toward creating a dating profile that will help you find love.

Even in cultures where an arranged marriage won’t elicit anything more than a flat “oh, really?” online dating is quickly growing into a viable alternative for people looking for casual flings, a steady relationship or even long-term commitment. Not that this comes as a big surprise, mind you, as the very concept of presenting your personality online is already familiar to anybody who has ever opened a social media account.

That being said, online dating is a whole different ball game. And compared to in, say, the U.S., the fine art of online dating isn’t as well developed in Indonesia—especially when it comes to creating a profile that “sells” on the singles market. One of the main problems with this part is that it’s all too easy for an online profile to be underwhelming or overwhelming, too eager or too timid, to say nothing of working out the intricacies of local customs that we might want to take into account as we delve into the realm of online hook-ups.

Now, of course, there are no hard rules (apart from an app’s or website’s terms of service and user agreement) to creating an online dating profile. Still, there are some tried-and-true methods—“best practices,” if you will—that you may want to consider and incorporate while tinkering with your digital dating CV.

The DOs

• Pick a catchy username. Using your full name is, obviously, not recommended. On the other hand, something like “John1980” doesn’t really say anything about who you are. Instead, use this opportunity to reveal something about yourself. For example, if you play the guitar, then “GuitarGuy” could be a good option. • Create a snapshot of who you are. Basically, you want to describe your most prominent positive character. A good way to determine which trait you want to focus on is to ask your closest friends how they would describe you if they were thinking about setting you up with somebody. • Be straightforward about what you’re looking for. Are you actually looking for a committed long-term relationship? Then don’t worry about putting that on your profile. Sure, some people might find that off-putting, but, well, those are exactly the people you’re not going to consider anyway, right? Same thing if you don’t want to commit to anything just yet.

The DON’Ts

• Write a biography. When you’re swiping between dozens, if not hundreds, of profiles on a dating app, you won’t have the time—or the inclination—to read an entire resumé. And so does everyone else. So, keep your profile short and concise. Keeping it to two or three sentences is a good rule of thumb. • Be vague. “I like music” might sound safe, but music could mean anything from jazz to death metal. If it is, for example, the former, then write down something like “I’ve always enjoyed classic jazz.” Same goes for other hobbies and passions. This way, you’ll stand out more and it’s more likely that you’ll catch the attention of people with similar interests. • Sound sarcastic, cynical or bitter. It’s never a good idea to define and promote yourself based on what you don’t like. Stating that “you don’t care about politics” might sound edgy or cool, but remember: positives attract! Hooking up with someone simply based on shared dislikes tends to lead to drama.

REMEMBER: POSITIVES ATTRACT! HOOKING UP WITH SOMEONE SIMPLY BASED ON SHARED DISLIKES TENDS TO LEAD TO DRAMA