Joyful or sombre ... what type of funeral we would choose
When Sky News presenter Colin Brazier’s wife Jo died recently aged 55 following a five-year battle with breast cancer, he asked those attending her funeral to wear black, adding that he believed bright colours were unfair on children and risked turning th
Alliance Party Leader and East Belfast MLA Naomi Long (46) lives in Belfast with her husband Michael. She says:
Ican completely understand where Colin Brazier is coming from with his wishes for his wife’s funeral. As a child of 10 years old I lost my dad and it was a very distressing time. I remember all these people coming to the house and laughing and joking and I was very upset.
I spoke to my mum about it and she explained that while they were sad inside, they were sharing happy memories of dad and laughing and reminiscing.
I didn’t understand that at the time as a child and found it all confusing.
It is hard to understand as a child how something so sad can be celebrated.
Losing dad was so painful for me and I didn’t really understand or come to terms with how you can share happy memories until my mum died a few years ago and I got tremendous comfort from people sharing stories about her.
As an adult I saw it differently. Adults and children do not see death the same.
I am a Christian, so I believe
death is not the end of the journey but there is hope beyond the grave.
I would like a religious service which marks and celebrates my life.
I would like people not to be miserable but to be comforted and uplifted by the service.
Church life is very important to me, so the hymns and prayers would be very important and I would like a part in picking them.
I had skin cancer a few years ago and at the time I thought I really should have a plan for my funeral, but instead of concentrating on that I began to take better care of myself.
I’d like someone to talk about me and my passions and what I stood for. The service should reflect the person. I helped my mum pick the hymns for her funeral and I’d like to pick mine. Death is about consoling those who are grieving and coping with loss.”