How you can remain fit and healthy despite a lockdown
No gym? No worries! Tess de la Mare reveals ways to stay active without breaking the rules during the coronavirus crisis
difficult for single parents with older children.
The TV goes on far more regularly than I would like, but I decide to quell the guilt. One morning, on deadline, I look up to realise that she is on her second viewing of her favourite movie that day.
She’s figured out the remote. “I’m practising an extreme form of ‘whatever works’ parenting,” I tell a friend.
“Suspend your normal rules and rituals around screen time, because you’ve got to do what you’ve got to do. These are not normal times. The normal rules and routines do not apply,” Joanna Fortune, psychotherapist and author of 15 Minute Parenting, tells me.
“I think single parents are actually better equipped than most to deal with this,” one single mother tells me.
“I for one am used to being trapped indoors when the milk runs out; three kids under nine means I can’t leave the house. I am used to online shopping, managing alone. We are better at multi-tasking, better at handling considerable anxiety due to personal struggles. Better at doing everything with kids in tow. I don’t allow my brain to go to what-if places.”
I know what she means. Sometimes, as I’m in the kitchen making yet another snack, a flash of the mind-bogglingly daunting nature of what lies ahead sweeps over me. It might be just the two of us, for months. It was my network that got me through the difficulty of the last few years, when my marriage fell apart and now we are cut off from them.
But even though this feels incredibly difficult, and draining, I also know for a fact that there is no way I will go under.
I’m exhausted, and frazzled, and crying on and off (like most of the friends I speak to), but I know also that I am in no danger of succumbing to anxiety over this. I don’t worry (not much anyway) about what I cannot control. In short, I can manage my mind.
That is because my friend is right. Single parents have developed a mental hardiness that at a time like now stands to us. A resilience.
Another mother confides that she has been sick for the past week, she thinks it is the coronavirus, and she is solo parenting. Are you okay? I ask.
She replies that she has parented alone through vomiting flu, so she can handle anything.
If you have survived a long relationship falling apart, you’ve had to get on, in the face of it all going to pieces. You’ve had to get up every morning and make it all okay for your children. You’ve coped with work and children overlapping.
And even with all the family and friends in the world, you’ve also had to do it by yourself to some extent.
You’ve woken up at four in the morning worried over something and comforted yourself back to equanimity.
You’ve watched your life as you knew it fall apart and you’ve picked up the pieces and put it all back together.
You’ve seen the life you wanted for your children crumble, and had to cope with that, and make it alright for them.
It’s different, and much scarier, right now, but in ways it is the same. If you are a single parent, chances are you have already proved to yourself you can cope. You have shown your children that you can.
It’s incredibly hard right now, and the future is daunting. But you are so much stronger than you might think.
Liadan Hynes’s first book, How to Fall Apart, about putting your life back together after the end of a marriage, is published on May 7. Pre-order now from Easons to be in with a chance to win a weekend spa break for two at Cliff at Lyons Hotel & Country Retreat in Kildare. www. easons.com
The coronavirus shutdown could mean bulging waistlines with most of the nation’s favourite sports and activities banned for at least three weeks.
But being trapped in the house doesn’t have to mean being stuck on the sofa, and with the NHS recommending everyone does at least 150 minutes of exercise per week, it is best to keep moving.
Here’s how to stay fit and healthy while avoiding Covid-19.
People are still allowed out to exercise, but only once a day and only alone or with members of your own household — so going for a run, cycle or a walk is fine, even though team events and club gatherings are off limits.
Images of crowded parks over the weekend caused outrage, with people seemingly ignoring the advice of keeping two metres apart, so a road route might be safest to avoid coming into close quarters with strangers.
With air pollution levels plummeting due to the lockdown, it might be more pleasant than you would think.
Visions of rubber-limbed Instagram yoga bunnies might be daunting, but in reality it begins with just a little light stretching to improve flexibility — there are even a range of movements that don’t require a yoga mat.
There are thousands of free websites offering video tutorials.
It might conjure up memories of playground rhymes, or even mental images of Rocky Balboa, but skipping is simple and gets the heart rate up in no time.
All non-essential shops are now closed and even Sports Direct has belatedly shut its doors, so you may need to rely on a younger member of the household for a skipping rope if you don’t already have one.
If you are short on gym equipment then you can always make use of a set of stairs, should you have them.
There are various exercises you can try including stair pushups, reverse lunges and tricep dips — even just walking up and down them a few times.
The call of the sofa might be strong — but see if you can resist Netflix for 20 minutes and try a quick workout instead.
Video tutorials: practising yoga in your house is possible with guidance on the internet; and (below) cycling outside is one option available to you
It might sound simple, but even sitting down and standing up again 10 times in a row will work out your thighs, or placing two hands on the sofa while extending one leg behind you will get your muscles burning.
Search “sofa workout” online for hundreds of videos.
Endlessly chipper wellness gurus might not be everyone’s cup of tea, but perhaps a dose of their endorphin supply is what is needed to get you through the Covid-19 crisis.
Joe Wicks (right), known as The Body Coach, has made it his mission to keep parents sane by offering daily online PE lessons to children during the lockdown, while Australian personal trainer Kayla Itsines is also popular. For those who prefer a bit of northern grit, Olympic heptathlon champion and Sheffield’s finest Dame Jessica Ennis-hill will be sharing tips.
Tamara Rojo, principle dancer and artistic director of the English National Ballet, has launched a range of Youtube videos.
They aren’t for the faint-hearted, so make sure you stay well within your limits to avoid tweaking a hamstring, or alternatively look for a barre workout — an exercise regime derived from ballet, but better for those with no previous experience.
It doesn’t burn off calories, but singing can do wonders for morale and choirs all over the country are going online to prevent their voices going rusty during the pandemic.
TV choirmaster Gareth Malone has set up the Great British Home Choir, while the 500-strong London City Voices is streaming its rehearsals directly on to Youtube.
❝ It’s incredibly hard right now and the future is daunting. But you’re much stronger than you think
If you are lucky enough to have a garden, get out in it. In fact, the nation’s most avid gardeners probably won’t notice the lockdown at all.
Now could be the time to plant an insect garden — purple flowers attract butterflies — while pots of herbs and easyto-grow seeds are available in most supermarkets.
You could even attempt an insect hotel with whatever you have lying around like twigs, pine cones, old roofing tiles and bricks.
Aimed at slowing the heart rate rather than raising it, meditation might just keep you sane and save your relationships after a month cooped up with your nearest and dearest.
There are dozens of apps promising to help you breathe your way to peace of mind — as long as you can find a quiet corner of your home to focus.
Calm, Headspace and Insight Timer are all popular, and will really be put to the test when confronted with parents trying to be teacher, breadwinner and live-in entertainer all at once.