Tough times, but some day we will look back on this and laugh

IT’S been a tough week. For everyone – those who have contracted the virus, those who have lost their jobs, those who have had to self-isolate on their own, with no one to check on them. And there’s nothing that any of us can do to fix the situation, except social distance ourselves in a bid to try and contain it. That, I suppose is the most important message of all.

My way of coping is to try and bring levity to the situation. Us Irish are good at that. We possess that kind of gallows humour that sees us laugh in the face of adversity and tragedy. The Brits have their stiff upper lip, the French have arrogance and the Americans have their fake cheeriness. We have our dark, irreverent sense of humour, Thank God.

Leaving the bigger picture aside, I’m relieved I have to stay at home. I’m not great at this social distancing lark. I’m a touchy feely kind of person. As soon as I see someone I know I want to hug them or kiss them or at least touch their arm. If I don’t like you I’ll just pretend I don’t see you. Or give you the death stare! Equally as effective.

And we all know I’m a talker. I can go to the supermarket and be gone for 3 hours because I stop to talk to anyone I meet. I do like a bit of deli counter gossip! You can’t have a conversation with someone when you’re standing 2 metres away. Sure you might as well tell the whole shop!

It’s been a tough week for many parents behind closed doors. Home schooling?! Jesus I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. I have one child who you practically have to nail to the chair to do any school work and who, after a half an hour declares, “I think that’s enough for one day.” And another one who insists on doing work with Spotify blaring at full blast.

Then there’s the constant requests for food. How can they be hungry an hour after they’ve had their breakfast? I’m just a 24 hour snack station which is slowly but surely running out of bloody snacks. We’re down to the last packet of chocolate biscuits now. It’s Rich Tea after that.

I’m also worried they’ll find out how academically insufficient I am, or ‘ thick’ for want of a better word.

They keep asking me questions that I don’t know the answer to, so I’m furtively googling away, hoping I won’t get caught and saying, “I’m not doing it for you. Work it out yourself!”

This whole situation is shite. I can’t put it more eloquently than that. But I really hope some day we will look back on this and laugh. Laugh at the fact that although we came close, we didn’t all kill each other.

There are brighter days ahead.

THEN THERE’S THE CONSTANT REQUESTS FOR FOOD. HOWCAN THEY BE HUNGRY AN HOUR AFTER THEY’VE HAD THEIR BREAKFAST?