Robin lived his life to the full, says devoted partner Carmel
ROBIN Evans, late of Macoyle Lower, Inch, Gorey, Co Wexford passed away on Friday, August 10, 2018 at the age of 56.
His partner of over 10 years Carmel Tighe-Finnerty remembers their time together with love and fondness.
Robin, a ghrá mo chroí, you are sadly missed by the Love of your life. ‘Faith, hope and love are gifts from God and the greatest one of all is love’ - this we told an individual one night.
‘A ring on a figure, married with children doesn’t make a man or a woman out of you. If you don’t have love in your heart you are not whole’.
We had plenty of love for each other.
Quote from As St Therese of Lisieux said ‘Without Love, Deeds, even the most brilliant, count as nothing’.
You spoke gallantly when you recited your poem in the Arklow Speech & Drama Festival as a student in Carysfort N.S.
I recall a few lines of it. Leisure by William Henry Davies – ‘What is this life if, full of care, we have no time to stand and stare. No time to stand beneath the boughs and stare as long as sheep or cows’.
When you were a little boy you were as proud as punch about the pet goat and ducks you had. You were chuffed with your Group Certificate results and midway in Intermediate Certificate you got your apprenticeship as a trainee mechanic in O’Mahony’s Garage via AnCo.
There you worked and gained valuable experience. As you cycled to work you would stop to bid the late Mr Kavanagh, Curranstown morning pleasantries and discuss current farming topics. You also had time for a neighbour’s child and help with their homework before school.
You eventually decided to set up your own garage. Before it got busy you bought a lorry and worked on the first Arklow Bypass.
Lorry by day, garage by evening. You shared your knowledge and trained a few mechanics. You used your talents wisely that you got from God. You could diagnose a problem with a vehicle even over the phone.
These are memories, more precious than gold, that I hold forever in my heart. From camping on the Aran Island to scuba diving in Malta and from mountain climbing on the Sugar Loaf, Mount Leinster and Croagh Patrick to the Smithfield Show in London to Paris Agricultural Show and Tullamore, Ballina and Balmoral shows in 2008.
We visited the Wild Atlantic Way Aillwee Caves and the Cliffs of Moher in Clare and the caves in Fermanagh to Giant causeway and rope bridge in Antrim.
You loved Abba the four of us went to see Mama Mai in East End while at Smithfield show. My friend Linda reminded me of our ice-skating skills there.
How you brought Linda and I around the arena ice-skating and you in the middle. We enjoyed Blood Brothers in the Olympia theatre and plays in the local hall in Inch. You knew your Bible and you loved having discussion with people on scripture such as Jehovah’s Witness.
I still laugh about our adventure trip across France to pick up the head of your harvester. Your driving skills improved rapidly when you noticed a few shocked French faces. You soon realised you were driving on the wrong side of the road.
Oh, the time we negotiated the traffic as we ducked and dived to arrive safely at the Arc de Triomphe, (I call this ‘spaghetti junction’) only to be greeted by a police man and woman who asked where are we from? Oh, the Irish, and they proceeded to show us the underground for us to use on our departure. Or horse riding in Spain with your broken collar bone. On one of our holidays we went of a safari day trip.
We were given water guns to have a water gun fight between both jeeps. There was a girl in our jeep that had a disability. Nobody would spray her with water. Oh, but Robin left nobody out. It didn’t matter race, colour, ability or disability you dowsed her, and she enjoyed it.
As I look back on photos. We celebrated your 50th birthday with your favourite cake – Black Forest Gateaux in your garage office.
We marked this milestone by our flying visit to Las Vegas in April where we flew over the Grand Canyon and the helicopters stopped in the Canyon for the people on board to have a champagne picnic.
We also did the tour of Hoover Dam and Lake Mead. We took in a show one night all in the space of four day’s round trip. You loved music Abba, Smokie, Saw Doctors, Rod Stewart, Bryan Adams to name just a few. You also spoke about the powerful voice of Gina Dale Haze and the Champions for such a petite lady. You loved your badminton and we left your good friend’s wedding early for you to play a match in Roundwood, which you won.
Another great passion of yours was History. While visiting Poland we went to Krakow while there we visited Auschwitz – Birkenau Memorial and salt mines.
On one of our many trips to U.K. we explored the gothic city of Cambridge and took in a chauffeured Punting tour on the river cam.
The following day we attended the Cheffins machinery sales.
I treated us to a Valentine weekend in Ashford Castle also to well deserve breaks in Slieve Russell in Cavan. There we went to a local Harvest Thanksgiving and tea in the rector’s home afterwards where he showed you the Lyle rake and you purchased one the following year.
Farming was another passion of yours you bought lands beside you in Macoyle and also in Redcross.
Our last weddings both took place at the end of July 2015 were in Luttrellstown Castle, Dublin and Skibbreeen, Co Cork. While there we visited Michael Collins place of death, Béal na Bláth. You always packed so much into so little time frame.
Typical Robin, you drove yourself to St. Vincent’s hospital on September 6, 2015 with symptoms of a stroke which turned out to be cancer.
We laughed, cried, kissed, hugged, played songs and reminiscing of the good old days and things yet to achieve on our ‘To Do List’.
Your long stays in hospital and me at your side with my knitting needles. A beautiful Aran jumper was created with love. Robin, you wore it proudly.
Our last film was Brooklyn in Dundrum Shopping Centre. Last visits to agriculture shows were to the National Ploughing Match in Tullamore 2016 and Balmoral in May 2017, to Miss Blue Jeans in Athboy, in 2016 and you had fun with the Archery while you were there.
After one of your many chemotherapy sessions you phoned me to see how I was getting on my journey back to Ballina after dropping you back to Arklow.
I asked were you resting. Oh no, ‘they were down a driver when I got home to draw in the silage’, you said. Or the night I phoned late and you were in the back of the crew-cab bringing home a new born calf from Ahare. You couldn’t be done without. You kept the show on the road.
To celebrate your 54th birthday we ticked another item off the To Do List by visiting the Titanic in Belfast.
As I look back on my diary for July/August 2017. I recall you spent a month in St Vincent’s hospital from July 14, 2017. You received a letter from a neighbour and customer on behalf of herself and her daughter, praising you, for your kindness, spirit and generosity over the previous 25 years as their mechanic and neighbour. She tells you that her daughter just got her law degree and has a job, she sends her wishes.
She then continues to say ‘I don’t believe any of our successes, or survival here, wouldn’t have been possible without you. You are truly the loveliest person I have ever known’.
Or when you couldn’t feed your calves any more you bought calf rearing machine to make your successor work load easier. You carried out your Christian duties. You visited the sick whilst as an inpatient and outpatient of St Vincent’s Hospital. You made sure I always had an All-Ireland Football ticket.
How you collapsed into my arms one evening. How I got up early on the morning of July 21, 2017 and between worried about you after your phoned call and me half asleep. I drove to the nearest service station. I topped up the car with petrol instead of diesel. It took me from Ballina, Co Mayo to Ballinalack, Mullingar, Co Westmeath. David O’Reilly the owner of the service station and DOE centre (a total stranger), got out of his bed and told me to get into his jeep and he drove 100km to St. Vincent’s hospital and had me there by 9 a.m.
I returned two days later to collect my car and to pay David. only to be told ‘I put €20 of diesel into it. Your car is repaired. You owe me nothing. Just give a donation to Cancer.’ He is an angel, one in a million.
How sick you were on July 28, 2017 and a colleague visited. You were so, so ill and unable to talk to him. Your kindness and caring shone through by phoning the next day to apologise.
I stayed with you for 12 days 24/7 until we returned from Beaumount hospital after you had head surgery.
Robin you proved the consultants wrong with their diagnosis of time span back in October 2015 and again in September 2017.
As I told you, it’s only the good man above who can tell you that. I got permission for you to leave the hospital daily. A change of environment, by uplifting our spirits and kept us both in a positive mind frame. This ignited your hope and your passion to fight this illness.
You bought the masticating juicer and I grew the wheatgrass, peas and sprouts.
The physical power of love brought you back from deaths door last February. The Power of Love.
Robin, I’m so delighted that I acknowledged my gut feeling and the signs, as I have done in the past. We spent Tuesday, August 7, 2018, together.
After we embraced each other with tenderness, I sadly departed room 12 in St. Vincent’s hospital I knew you were in the departure lounge.
As you waited in the lounge of departure, you knew not the time of your flight. Your guardian angel had whispered to you. Prepare for flight EI135, Gate 12, Destination – Going Home. You knew you were destined for a place of graceful beauty and your soul rejoicing. Awaiting the essence of Gods’ pure love. For you read their fine brochure, the Bible. You spoke to them often in your prayers.
Robin, you lived your life like the song Candle in the Wind. Your flame quenched and your flight departed at 01.35 a.m. on August 10, 2018 and the heavens awaited your arrival.
The stars shone brightly to light up your path the stairways to Heaven. As we always rushed for our flights. You always beckoned me, Come On, Come On. But this time, it was a solo flight.
Our last journey we shared together was from St. Vincent’s mortuary to your home – just the two of us.
‘The best things in Life are the people we Love, the places we’ve been and the memories we’ve made along the way’ - St. Therese of Lisieux.
These memories we shared together will help me through the heart ache of losing you.
I will not be consumed with grief. I celebrate your life and embrace our life. As I take comfort, surrender, reflect and honour the words of the Lord’s Prayer ‘We forgive those who trespass against us’.
You are my Guardian Angel, Spirit, Guide and Soul mate, from our first meeting many, many moons ago, one St. Stephen’s night in Poole’s of Gorey. We will meet again in a brighter land where farwell is never spoken. We will hold each other, hand in hand and the clasp will never be broken.
The Eternal Flame of Love. Finally, I would like to express my gratitude to the gravediggers who prepared Robins’ final resting place. As I stood and watched them fill in Robin’s grave with due care and respect.
From the bottom of my heart, I like to sincerely thank all those who sympathised with me on the passing of Robin. It’s so hard to forget someone who gave me so much to remember.
Your loving partner Carmel xx
Ar dheis Dé, go raibh a Anam.