WE STILL HAVEN’T SAID ‘I LOVE YOU’

My boyfriend and I have a lovely relationship. He is 32, I am 28 and we have been together for around a year. We have both had several previous relationships. We love spending time together and being there for one another. We have lots of shared interests and have great fun. He is attractive, has a good job and our sex life is great, but I have never told him that I love him and he hasn’t said it to me, either. It just somehow doesn’t seem necessary, although I am absolutely sure that we both do. Is it important in a relationship to tell your spouse or partner that you love them? Most people who really love each other want to hear those three words: ‘I love you’. I often get letters from men and women who are deeply hurt that their partner rarely or never tells them that they love them. Or they feel let down if they ask their partner and are fobbed off with: ‘You know I love you’ or ‘I wouldn’t have married you if I didn’t love you.’ Of course, how you treat a person and making them feel loved is equally important, but, for most people, it means so much to be told. The fact that you are asking whether it matters suggests that you want to hear it, too. Perhaps it’s difficult for you to say because you have done this in previous relationships and they have ended. Or maybe, though you think he loves you, deep down you are not 100 per cent sure, so you want him to say it first. Valentine’s Day is the perfect opportunity, so why not take a risk?