MY PARTNER DOESN’T FIND ME ATTRACTIVE

I am 63 and for the past three years I have been in a relationship with a man who is ten years younger than me. I was physically attracted to him from the start, but when we began having a sexual relationship, I could tell that he didn’t feel the same way. It seemed as though he was just making an effort to please me, but not enjoying it himself. We are like chalk and cheese. I am overweight and have body issues, whereas he goes to the gym and keeps himself in good shape. My friends think he is gorgeous. I feel as though he is repulsed by my body. He never touches me intimately – even kissing me seems to be a problem. I bought some sexy underwear, but he made a sarcastic remark about me wearing it. If I try to discuss it, he gets angry. He misses his mother who died a few years ago, but adores mine and gets on brilliantly with my children and grandchildren and loves doing things with all of us. Part of me knows that I should get out of the relationship, but there is a little bit inside me that hopes one day things will change. To make love to a man who is unenthusiastic is soul-destroying. Unfortunately, it sounds as though he is not really attracted to you, but enjoys your company and loves spending time with you. I suspect this could be because he is missing his mother, or perhaps he didn’t have a good family life, so is drawn to yours. I wish I could say that he should love you as you are, but sadly men are often not wired this way. Some don’t mind if their partner is overweight, but I know that other men do. I receive many letters from men who say that although they love their wives, they are not attracted to them or don’t want to make love any more because they have become overweight, which has caused problems. The fact that he gets angry when you try to discuss your worries is also a cause for concern, so you probably need to end it and find someone more supportive.