My partner never wants to make love to me

I met my partner two years ago at a friend’s wedding. We had been at secondary school together, but had not seen each other since. We kept in touch, then met up six months later. He was unemployed due to a head injury. I encouraged him to return to work and he found a well-paid job, which he loves. He says that he could not have done it without me. I even arranged a party for his 50th and invited friends who he hadn’t seen for more than 20 years and he was appreciative. However, we don’t do anything together as a couple – he hasn’t even taken me out to dinner. My biggest issue, though, is that he hardly ever wants to make love. He says that he doesn’t think about sex and that I am confusing it with love. Other men have told me that I am sexy and desirable, but now I no longer feel that way. We are more like housemates. I know that he loves me, but am I wrong to think that sex would prove this? He has never been married or had children. I have two grown-up children and my marriage ended seven years ago. No, you are not wrong to feel this way. For most people, sex is an important part of a loving, close and emotional relationship and it is sad that it rarely happens for you. I understand that this must make you feel rejected. For a man in his 50s to not think about sex suggests that there could be a problem. Could it be that he sees you as a close friend, but for him there is no sexual chemistry? This does not mean that you are not an attractive woman. Is he enjoying solo sex rather than making love to you? The problem may even be that he has a low sex drive. If so, ask him to see his GP. It could be caused by stress, anxiety, depression – or his head injury. It may be that he has low testosterone levels and these problems could be helped with medication such as Viagra or Cialis. However, have you also considered the possibility that though he may love you, he may in fact be gay? Tell your partner about your concerns so you can discuss the problem.