Should we be more than friends?


I have been get­ting to know a woman on Face­book. We talk about lots of things in­clud­ing re­la­tion­ships and sex. Like me, she is in her early 50s and has never been mar­ried. She says that she has been a ca­reer woman and not had time for ro­mance. She is very re­li­gious (a Chris­tian) and does not be­lieve in sex be­fore mar­riage, so is still a vir­gin. She thinks that mas­tur­ba­tion is a sin and vis­it­ing pros­ti­tutes is wrong. I see her more as a friend but she thinks that I am gor­geous and hand­some. She has asked me a lot of per­sonal ques­tions about my past re­la­tion­ships. She has a charming, warm per­son­al­ity, but is per­haps not as at­trac­tive as me. I go to church fairly reg­u­larly. Do all re­li­gious women have sim­i­lar be­liefs? These are tra­di­tional be­liefs (though the is­sue of mas­tur­ba­tion is con­tro­ver­sial be­cause the Bi­ble doesn’t ac­tu­ally men­tion it) and a lot of de­vout Chris­tian women may in­deed hold them, even if they don’t al­ways stick to them. But this isn’t rel­e­vant, is it? What mat­ters to you is what this par­tic­u­lar woman thinks and it sounds as though you are not sure whether you want to be more than friends. I sup­pose that the only way you will find out is by meet­ing her and see­ing if she is as warm and charming as she seems to be on­line. Your views are more re­laxed and dif­fer­ent to hers. This could present a num­ber of dif­fi­cul­ties if you ever de­cide to start a re­la­tion­ship. You prob­a­bly need to look else­where for love.

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