What does my wife want from me?

My wife and I separated last May. Recently she came to my house because she had had a horrible week and needed to talk to someone who understood her. I listened to her for about an hour, praised her and gave her a hug. I told her how much I cared for her. Then she kissed me. I am still in love with her and thought that maybe we could sort things out. But the next day she called me and said that she cannot be with me as I can’t do the things that she wants to do. I have an illness that has partially disabled my left leg and my wife seemed to stop being my partner and became my nurse instead, which was not what I wanted. I was in a lot of pain and admit I was difficult on occasion. She tends to talk to me only when she needs something. What should I do? Sadly, I think that your wife is simply using you when she needs someone to talk to. She knows that you still care and is exploiting your kindness. This is unfair, selfish and unkind of her. It sounds as though she decided to end the marriage because you are ill, forgetting her wedding vows to stay ‘in sickness and in health’. It does not say much for her, I’m afraid. If you keep hoping that you might get back together, it will be much more difficult for you to move on and rebuild your life, and stop you from meeting someone else. In your longer letter, you say that you are having counselling. This is important and I hope it will help you to be tougher towards her and let her sort out her own problems rather than turning to you, which only leaves you hurt and confused.