SIBLING THERAPY – CAN IT HELP?

Natasha, 35, a teacher, attended sibling therapy with her sister Chloe, 34. She says: ‘My sister and I have always been really close and really competitive. There’s less than a year between us and we don’t have other siblings. However, in our 20s we drifted apart. We were both busy establishing careers and I was also in a relationship and have since got married. I probably had less time for my sister than she did for me – I think Chloe, who is single, found it harder than I did. She was very prickly and I knew that she wasn’t happy, but I couldn’t seem to mend things. She started having therapy, then asked me if I’d have a session with her. I didn’t hesitate; it was a chance to reconnect.

‘First, I went to see the therapist alone and told her how I felt. Then we had a two-hour session together. It was weird – like we were on a TV show – but looking back it was a pivotal moment. We had to listen to one another without interruption and there was a truly objective person – rather than our mum or dad – to mediate. My sister was able to say she felt neglected, frozen out. I told her why I found it difficult when we were together. At the end of the session, the therapist asked us both what we would like to happen next and we went away with ideas about how to improve our relationship. It was exhausting but helpful. I want my sister in my life and for her to be happy. Now we try to do one thing a week together, such as see a film or an exhibition. It’s good to know we can go back for another therapy session if we need to.’