I’ve got a crush on a much younger woman

After a hiatus of seven years when my last long-term relationship ended, I met a woman scarcely half my age who worked in my local pub. To start with we’d just talk, but I began to develop feelings for her and thought it was better to go to other pubs for a while. Then, on a whim, I went back. She greeted me like a long-lost friend and asked why I hadn’t been in for four months. I explained and she told me not to be silly, that I wasn’t bothering her and that she liked me. She then revealed she was at university and not happy with her boyfriend because of his drinking habits. We hugged and she suggested that maybe we could go out sometime. I was still uncertain. Did she not realise that I was nearly 30 years older? Eventually, I emailed the pub, told them about it and said that it would be nice to hear from her. I got a forthright reply saying I should never email her again and she wasn’t interested. I still have feelings for her despite the ridiculous age gap. I’m sorry to have to tell you, but I think you might have misinterpreted this girl’s intentions. She was probably just being friendly and perhaps a bit flirtatious but without really meaning it. However, even if she was interested, you need to be sensible and walk away. It wasn’t wise to email the pub; this was likely embarrassing for her and could have opened you up to ridicule. They probably saw your interest in her as inappropriate – she is barely out of her teens and you will shortly be 50, so it’s too big a gap at her age. I think one of the reasons you have developed a bit of an obsession with her is because you sound lonely and perhaps a little depressed. So please see your GP for a referral to counselling as it could help you to develop your social life and in time look for a woman nearer your age.