WHY DO WOMEN PREY ON MY LONELINESS?

QI’m a 74-year-old man and I’ve been divorced for nearly five years. In that time

I’ve only had one girlfriend but sadly she died last year. So I started using dating apps. It took me a while to realise that a lot of women were conning me. They sounded convincing, telling me heavy, heartwrenching stuff, tales of dreadful things that had happened in their lives, what they had been through, how they had lost everything… My friends were telling me that they were only interested in my money, but I only woke up to the reality after I had lost several thousand euro. It turns out loneliness is big business. At my age I can feel so isolated and this is what they prey on. Where do I go from here?

AIt’s so sad that you feel lonely and isolated and that you have had such upsetting experiences with dating apps. Unfortunately there are people who take advantage of kindness, so don’t feel embarrassed. It just shows that you have a big heart. I expect you were also feeling vulnerable – you have had two big losses in a short space of time. I think it would help you to speak to someone about the loneliness you are feeling, so contact a charity such as Age Action (ageaction.ie) or ALONE (alone.ie). They offer befriending services and advice on loneliness. It is important to make the effort to stay socially active. With that extra support of talking through your problems, you will hopefully start to feel better about yourself. This will help you meet someone more naturally as you expand your social network and take up new activities.

CONTACT CAROLINE Write to Caroline West-Meads at: YOU Magazine, PO Box 5332, Dublin 2, or email c.west-meads@youmagazine.ie. Caroline reads all letters but

regrets that she cannot answer them all personally. DON’T FORGET: BEL MOONEY’S ADVICE COLUMN APPEARS EXCLUSIVELY IN FEMAIL EVERY THURSDAY – ONLY IN THE IRISH DAILY MAIL