The one lesson I’ve learned from life
ALEXANDRA BURKE, 29, is a singer and West End star. She won The X Factor in 2008 and last year reached the final of Strictly Come Dancing. She lives with her fiance Josh and their four dogs.
IT’S OK TO SAY YOU’RE NOT OK
IT’S special to be still working ten years after winning The X Factor. I did take a moment the other day to reflect on everything I’ve gone through since then, and it made me take a deep breath because I’m so lucky — just a normal girl who had a massive dream.
But it hasn’t been plain sailing since X Factor. I took a life-coaching course in 2013 in New York to help with my confidence. I was quite low back then — changing record labels knocked me.
In this industry, it’s easy to be smiling all the time and saying everything’s great. I never opened up about anything, and everything was always fine. Lifecoaching helped me to become stronger and be honest. It hit me that it’s OK to say you’re not alright all the time. It’s changed me.
The life-coach had no idea I was a singer and said to me: ‘We want you to come and work as a life-coach here.’ That’s when my mum [Melissa Bell, a member of 1980’s band Soul II Soul] said: ‘Actually, she’s a singer.’
Still, when, in 2014, I was offered a role in The Bodyguard in the West End, I remember not wanting to take it because I didn’t think I could execute six shows a week, let alone eight.
It was Mum who said: ‘Get on with it. Find the confidence.’
One day she called me and said: ‘If you don’t take this, I’m just going to tell them you said yes,’ — and there we go! My mum is the reason I’ve got a theatre career. I also met my fiance Josh, a stage manager, through the show. So it’s all down to her.
Our Christian faith was a big deal for us growing up. But I’ve struggled with my faith recently because of what I’ve gone though [Alexandra’s mother died last year at 53]. But I know that God is a big part of my life and always will be.
Today, if I can move someone to speak out and not keep things locked in, that’s maybe why I’m here. I just think that’s important: to try and stay positive in the darkest hour.