GWYN and BEAR IT !
It’s the Spanish spa resort beloved of the celebrities but you too can see the benefits to your mind and body if you only...
IT’S helped put the Spa firmly in Spain and is believed to be a magnet for the world’s top celebrities to unwind and find their zen.
Gwyneth Paltrow, Kylie Minogue, Naomi Campbell and Barbra Streisand are all said to have visited the SHA Clinic for its fusion of ancient Eastern philosophy and cutting-edge Western techniques, although naturally staff remain tight-lipped about their clientele.
So, after a long hard winter you deserve to pamper yourself... and if it’s good enough for the famously fussy Gwynnie then...
Within seconds of arriving there, I immediately realise the attraction for Gwynnie and Co.
Overlooking the stunning Mediterranean coastline, the property, complete with make-shift waterfalls, artwork and statement furniture, is white minimalist, a tip of the hat to the Feng Shui philosophy of creating calm spaces. (All those years studying symbolism for Junior Certificate English is standing me in good stead.)
While there were numerous NewYear-New-Me options available such as detox, weight-loss and sleep-recovery programmes, on their advice, I signed up for the four-day Discovery – ideal for first-timers.
DAY ONE:
And I am immediately whisked off to the clinic, just a short stroll from the reception area. The doctor and nurse give me a check-up before I am introduced to the nutritionist.
They explain to me the principles of a macrobiotic diet – an Eastern tradition that has inspired much of the restaurant’s menus. The major principles, I learn, are to reduce animal product in favour of local and seasonal options, notably whole, unrefined foods like cereals, pulses and vegetables.
Having identified that my energy levels were in need of a boost, the nutritionist customises my forthcoming meals by adding a handful of ingredients such as sauerkraut, hiziki and apple vinegar.
On a less positive note, she warns me that guilty pleasures including, but not limited to, caffeine and alcohol would be shown short shrift during my stay. (I distinctly hear my well-worn liver whisper ‘muchas gracias, SHA!’)
Following a deep-tissue massage, I put these nutritional discussions to the test and take my seat in the clinic’s elegant restaurant, which enjoys panoramic vistas across the Mediterranean Sea.
There are three different menus available depending on personal goals – Kushi, Biolight and SHA.
Over the course of the following four days, I mix and match, but on my first night, tired after being up with the lark, I opt for SHA, suitable for those who ‘wish to learn about a healthier diet without compromising on the amount of food nor their gourmet tastes.’
Despite my concerns about the absence of my usual staples – meat, eggs, dairy, potatoes (and a glass of Sauvignon Blanc) – I find myself pleasantly surprised by the taste of the immaculately presented dishes.
As I sip a herbal tea and enjoy some people-watching, I concede that there would be scant chance of me being able to rustle up anything similar in my kitchen back home.
But, before I can shout, ‘I’m no Darina Allen!’, I discover a recipe book in my bedroom and find myself being signed up to a cookery class later on in the week.
It seems SHA has little interest in excuses.
DAY TWO:
Tuesday’s itinerary begins with a one-on-one mindfulness class – a stark reminder that while the clinic is teeming with expensive treatments and procedures, it’s often those simple moments like being present in the here and now that can be most effective.
Likewise, the yoga that I practise later in the afternoon is equally satisfying, and, even though my acupuncture session results in me doing like Rip Van Winkle and catching forty winks, overall, I feel my energy levels shooting through the proverbial roof.
Another highlight on Day Two is Indiba – which is, according to the booklet, a revolutionary treatment that involves (here’s the science bit) sending monopolar radiofrequency energy deep into the skin’s dermis and sub-dermal layer.
The procedure has numerous benefits ranging from reducing cellulite to tackling double chins and saggy arms.
So instantaneous were the benefits, I was just short of cancelling my personal training session scheduled for the following morning. Almost.
DAY THREE:
Gyms have always intimidated me – give me a class setting and I will thrive but the idea of being in the middle of an army of Herculean buffs, pumping and sweating, sends shivers down my spine.
But, inspired by the setting, I am determined to free myself from these fears and preconceptions and make the most of the opportunity.
Before I even got to say ‘hola!’, an instructor has me stretched out across a table, analysing my body’s functioning levels.
My hip rotation impresses while my stiff shoulders do not (hours stooped over a computer has consequences, I’m told).
From there, we compile a series of exercises that play to my body’s strengths and weaknesses.
Speaking of weaknesses, that afternoon, during my cookery class, myself and fellow guest Nigora Bannatyne tackle sushi for the first time – her husband, Duncan, reports that my results weren’t terrible just a little fishy!
As a reward for my A-for-effort attempts in the kitchen, I am treated to a BDR facial – a procedure that’s informally known as the Benjamin Button Facial on account of its ability to turn back the clock and battle everything from acne and scars to hyperpigmentation and wrinkles.
DAY FOUR:
Not only the highlight of my final day but, possibly, the entire programme. The Watsu water massage lasts just shy of an hour. The masseur softly guides me across the pool’s warm surface as calming music plays around me, complemented by flickering candles and the scent of essential oils perfuming the space. This floating massage is so stressrelieving it leaves me... well, all floaty.
I’m not certain if the tears I then shed are as a result of this relaxing experience or at the prospect of having to return home to the cold of Ireland that evening.
Either way, I reach for the Kleenex and reluctantly checked out.