IN THE DRIVING SEAT
As a successful working mother Sonya Lennon rails against those who want her to slow down
SHE’S a TV presenter, stylist, fashion designer and a business woman who set up her own charity, as well as being a mum to 13-year-old twins. But don’t dare ask Sonya Lennon how she balances parenthood and work life.
‘I despair at this question,’ she says with a sigh. ‘It’s not a question that is asked of men and men are parents too. I have been in conversations where people have said: ‘Is Dave babysitting the kids tonight.’ And I say: ‘No he’s not. He’s parenting. They are his too.’ That’s not a reflection on Dave [her partner]. It is the way we compartmentalise things in society and it’s not right.’
It’s no wonder, then, that the Dress For Success Dublin charity, set up by Sonya, has spent the past month campaigning for action to address the gender pay gap here which amounts to an average 14 per cent difference between women and men.
‘Those who deny the gender pay gap are doing a huge disservice to both women and men,’ Sonya says.
‘This is not just about the indisputable numbers; it’s about how we can build workplaces that allow everyone to achieve their full potential – and societies that ensure people have the choices and supports they need in their personal and professional lives.’
And this is one of the things that Dress For Success was set up to do - support women who want to get back to the workplace after periods of unemployment by not only providing the outfit for that interview but also preparation sessions with HR professionals, educational workshops and mentoring programmes.
Sonya is warm and witty in person, fizzing with energy and enthusiasm. So it’s almost hard to believe that this human dynamo ever had any kind of a wobble. But, like so many other women, she says the first flushes of motherhood were a struggle.
‘I tell you when I lost confidence in myself was after I had the twins,’ she says of Evie and Finn who are now 13.
‘It was before Off The Rails when I was a jobbing stylist and I was doing very well. I remember my obstetrician saying to me ‘now there are two children in there, you are not Wonder Woman you need to take it easy, stop working no less than a month before your due date and give yourself a chance to recover after.
‘I took her advice and the twins were probably three months old before I started doing a bit of work again. But even so, I remember not really being able for social interaction in the way I was before.’
It was, she says, one of the reasons that the idea for Dress For Success came to her later on.
‘I just felt out of sorts, disconnected, ‘ she explains. ‘I think that’s really one of the reasons why Dress For Success means such a huge amount to me. Because it really takes very little to knock your spirit.
THE good news is that it takes very little to build it back up again but if you are constantly getting knocked then you can find yourself quite far down the chain without even realising. But then nature has a funny way of making you focus on your baby or babies to the exclusion of everything else so you do lose your footing a little bit and you have to force yourself to get back into the trenches.
‘But then nature has a funny way of making you focus on your baby or babies to the exclusion of everything else so you do lose your footing a little bit and you have to force yourself to get back into the trenches.
‘That was certainly my experience. And that was the first time I think that I really felt a palpable sense of not having full confidence.’
Sonya is at pains to point out that she has never had any experience of postnatal or other types of clinical depression so is talking from her own point of view. ‘I don’t have any experience of depression or a really profound loss of confidence but it did impact me at the time and I could see how that could impact me and become something bigger.
‘Confidence is a very brittle creature - it needs a lot of love to keep it going, self-love the love of others. And sometimes you have to just force yourself to get back up on top again.
I remember having a dream one time when I was going through a particularly rough patch in business and feeling like I was drowning but not giving myself that option in the course of a dream - having a chat to myself and saying: ‘Don’t even think about it. Get up there and swim.’ So there is that feeling of engaging in a bit of tough love with yourself to get back out there.’
WHEN RTE put Sonya with Brendan Courtney as a presenter of Off The Rails, she had no idea that the firm friendship that blossomed between them would also turn into a business partnership.
Their designer label Lennon Courtney has just celebrated its tenth birthday, no small achievement considering Sonya set up her own business in her forties.
‘I am a classic late starter,’ she laughs. ‘ I was 40 when I was asked to present Off The Rails. Before that I was a stylist, a gun for hire, a sole agent with no commitment to anyone or anything.
‘And then it was really only when I went into RTÉ that I realised there was an asset in play and something to deal with which was a profile that was built on trust and recognition.
‘Brendan already had a production company in the UK so I decided to set up the charity Dress For Success and when that got up off the ground I had forced myself to learn a masterclass in business, going from nought to 100 in what seemed like seconds at the time. And then I thought well if I can set up a not-for-profit, surely I can use what I have learned to start a business?’
And that was really how Lennon Courtney got off the ground through working on the TV show, the pair realised there was something missing for many women when it came to fashion.
‘We knew there was a niche for a womenswear label that we couldn’t find in the course of the show,’ Sonya says. ‘We knew we needed stuff to make women feel good that wasn’t out there. So like all successful businesses, it was built on necessity.’
You need to be selfishly generous... put your own oxygen mask on first so you are fit for purpose