Celeb counter-resolution

SINCE the great, the good and the ne’er-do-wells lead such busy lives, I presume they haven’t had time to make New Year’s resolutions – so here’s some I made earlier… Leo Varadkar should take time out to watch Titanic – and remind himself that the bit of the iceberg that you can actually see isn’t the part that drags you down. Less optics, more substance in 2019 please. Eve Hewson. Spare a thought for the young actress: in addition to the ‘what’s it like to be a woman?’ question that every woman in the entertainment industry must endure daily, poor Eve must also contend with the ‘what’s it like having Bono for a dad?’ question. So far, the Killiney girl has demonstrated great patience with all this malarkey. She should resolve to always count to three before she delivers her pat, predictable response – even if it’s Killing Eve. All that being said, I really think Saoirse Ronan should resolve to tell the next interviewer who asks her if she wants children to take a running jump. Roy Keane. Where will Roy land next? If it’s to be anywhere other than his own sofa (with occasional forays to ITV’s), then the Cork man must resolve to learn some fundamental rules of physics – to wit, that the world does not revolve around him. Kanye West should resolve to go to see Hamilton, the hit musical – incidentally, the best show I’ve ever seen on stage – and take on board the advice from one of its biggest songs: ‘talk less, smile more’. Theresa May should perhaps clear her diary now for this year’s Strictly. It would most likely be the best career move she’s made in years. Donald Tru... – oh, look! I’ve run out of room. Maybe 2019 is going to be a good year after all. Happy New Year!