Boris and Leo singing from same hymn sheet

FAMOUS doubleacts in Liverpool? Some might say Salah and Firmino; those with longer memories could throw in Rush and Dalglish, or even Keegan and Toshack. But really, if you’re talking about double-acts in Liverpool, there’s only one show in town. You’re talking Lennon and McCartney.

The question, though, is this: if Leo Varadkar and Boris Johnson are the Brexit Beatles, then which album were we going to get yesterday?

The last time they met in Dublin, it was A Hard Day’s Night – at least, it looked like that’s what Boris had endured. Or maybe Help! – because that’s what was clearly needed after a pretty brutal impasse in negotiations.

Perhaps yesterday would be Revolver, on the basis that the same questions were just going round and round. Or maybe even a plaintive Let It Be – because it seemed obvious that there is simply no way to square the circle of the North leaving the EU with Britain, but not having a customs border with the Republic of Ireland.

What we actually got, though, was the Magical Mystery Tour.

Because, bizarrely, after the Taoiseach and the prime minister had agreed to hold one of the most important summits ever between our respective heads of government, at the behest of Downing Street, its location was kept secret. Why? It was more bonkers than I Am The Walrus.

Firstly, why on earth would you even want to try to keep the location secret? If you need to keep the media a long way away from the talks themselves, that’s fine – most big country hotels in the UK will enable you to do that.

And secondly, did anyone really think it would work?

On Wednesday, journalists were officially briefed that the private engagement would be in ‘north-west England’, but the Taoiseach went on to tell TDs and senators at a private party meeting that evening that he was heading for Cheshire the following morning.

So off we all flocked to Liverpool, with only a metaphorical wave to the Cavern Club on the way (though we did of course

Political Correspondent land at John Lennon Airport), before we started picking up clues. The Mystery Tour was under way!

Aided and abetted by a slightly bemused taxi driver, our car – following a tip-off – was pointed in the direction of Wirral to a location some 22km from the city centre.

After pulling in to scout one hotel on the outskirts of a quaint English village, and seeing a photographer outside and an array of flags, the hotel quickly confirmed that no such event was happening there today. Hello, Goodbye indeed.

Thornton Manor, a luxury wedding venue, was just up the road. After we pulled up, a woman in a suit appeared through a crack in the gatehouse door asking for credentials – but then a colleague was quickly advised that ‘no-one was due’ there today. Hmmm. Suspicious. Moments later, a man in a suit appeared from inside the hotel gates and advised us we were not allowed to stand on the path on the property’s perimeter. He sang dumb on any knowledge of any important meeting happening inside and told us he was the gardener.

I didn’t ask if he was taking me for The Fool On The Hill – though the thought did cross my mind.

And at 11.44am, I was proved right: the first of the Fab Two arrived.

Asix-vehicle motorcade moved at a steady pace around the corner and in through the open gates. BoJo’s presence was confirmed by a sighting of his blond mop-top as he climbed out of his Jaguar.

Twenty-two minutes later, the Taoiseach’s contingent arrived.

And that’s when they got down to making serious music together.

Some had expected the meeting to go on for some 90 minutes, but it was a full three hours later – shortly after 3.10pm – that a joint statement emerged saying some progress had been made.

Dublin and London advised us ‘a detailed and constructive discussion’ was had and the two sides ‘agreed that they could see pathway to a possible deal’.

Pictures emerged of the pair chatting, joking, and even heading for a walk in the woods all by themselves. And afterwards, an upbeat Leo said he did now believe a deal could possibly be done by October 31.

Given what we’d all expected, to call this particular mystery tour ‘magical’ would be a gross understatement.

Still, it goes to show, however deep the divisions, All You Need Is Love. As Lennon and McCartney put it: ‘There’s nothing you can do that can’t be done…’