LIFE IS BEACHY
Sun-kissed coastlines, friendly natives and underwater adventures make Barbados a place where truly...
IF THE word paradise conjures images in your mind’s eye of a Caribbean island with sunkissed beaches all year round, then you will find it in Barbados.
It certainly fitted my perception of a Caribbean paradise. The fact that, strictly speaking, it’s in the Atlantic Ocean, not the Caribbean Sea, is for pedants. Although you could fly from Venezuela in South America to Barbados in 75 minutes.
I posted Typically Tropical’s 1974 hit (Going To) Barbados on social media after checking in at the Virgin Atlantic desk in Gatwick. This is a family paper so I won’t repeat some of the comments I got — Barbados has that jealousy-inducing cachet.
At Gatwick’s World Duty Free, I bought 200 Benson & Hedges for my stay. Disregarding the fact that I should know better than to still smoke, it’s also a rookie error for a first time visitor to the island.
The permitted amount you can bring is zilch. The duty is 65 Barbadian Dollars per 200, which is about €30. Alcohol limits are capped at a miniscule 100ml too.
On board the Barbados-bound Virgin Atlantic flight, the safety announcement was aided by a humorous cartoon on the seat screen in front of me.
As well as decent quality food, the strawberry-flavoured ice lolly handed to me topped with hundreds and thousands made me smile 35,000 feet above the ocean; funky and fun.
WE TOUCHED down at 3.25pm local time, ‘gaining’ five hours in time difference. There is no need to ask where the taxi rank is at Grantley Adams Airport. The drivers seek out the wide-eyed travellers coming into Arrivals burdened with cases. Mine gave me a potted history of the island in the 20-minute trip to my hotel in Christ Church. I notice quickly that the Christian ethos of the English, who colonised Barbados in the 17th century, survives in other parish names such as Saint Thomas, Saint James, Saint Lucy and Saint Michael.
The Accra Beach Hotel & Spa, at which I was based, gave me a spacious suite, with a king-plusplus-sized bed on which Henry VIII and all his wives could have slept.
I soaked the eight-hour flight from my bones while watching CNN on the wallmounted TV from a circular bath. You could jump from the bed to the bath and back through a blinded window, connecting bedroom and bathroom if you were so minded. I chose instead to watch an interview with US presidential hopeful Joe Biden.
I let the sun dry me as I walked past the two outdoor hotel pools and bar that will sell you a beer for the equivalent of €6. This is the country that claims to have given the world rum, and cocktails at about €8 were eliciting oohs and ahhs of satisfaction as this now teetotaller passed.
I had no need to fight for space when I walked straight on to the beach from the back of the hotel on a more overcast day than I anticipated. My feet sank into the sand in the paradise I had imagined. It was, however, the beginning of hurricane season, so the winds, though warm, whipped up the waves as they roared to the shore.
The last damaging hurricane, Allen, was on August 4, 1980, so I wasn’t too fearful of paradise being postponed.
Many cite December to April as the best time to go as the humidity levels are lower than early July, when I visited.
Barbados’s most famous daughter, pop star Rihanna, has a giant condo at Sandy Lane, where the island’s high-rollers reside. John Magnier, Dermot Desmond and JP McManus own a luxury hotel there too.
The high walls prevent a view of the Umbrella singer’s $22million mansion. Instead, the next day, I went to Bridgetown and the parish of St Michael’s to view the house in which she grew up to become one of the biggest stars in the world.
I expected flocks of American fans to be posting posed pictures outside her very modest house on the renamed Rihanna Drive. It was July 4 and I heard numerous US accents at my hotel for that morning’s pricey BBD$60 (€27) breakfast. But nobody paid homage apart from your pale middleaged male from Ireland.
Michael, my taxi driver, took me next to Kensington Oval Cricket ground, a sporting venue held in huge affection all over the world due to its compact size and great atmosphere. A statue of Garfield Sobers, one of the greatest cricketers of all time, plays a shot in stone on the plinth at the entrance to the ground. They might erect a statue to Eoin Morgan outside Lords someday, but maybe not on O’Connell Street.
I bid Michael goodbye with BBD$50 (€23) in his hand for the two-stop trip through Bridgetown.
I was unable to gain access to the island’s parliament as the legislators were in situ so I went instead to the museum in its grounds which tells the interesting story of how Barbados has
been home to a democracy since 1639. BBD$10 (€4.50) was a small price to while away an hour out of the street heat.
I was soon blistering in the sun again and bought a coconut flavoured turnover for BBD$8 (€3.65) from one of the many stalls you’ll find on almost every narrow street in Bridgetown. You’ll even spot a Woolworths store on Prince William Henry Street. I walked in and that familiar heady pharmacological smell hit me in the nostrils. The Tide Is High by Blondie was playing as I walked in; it could have been 1980 again.
De Ox Deli in The Collonade offered ‘De best in Bajan Cuisine’ according to its signage. From behind the counter, another Michael bid me to try the swordfish, sweet potato, rice and chicken marinated in a sweet and spicy sauce and fruit and vegetables salad. ‘You won’t regret it,’ he said. He was right.
I then took one of the capital’s yellow buses from the central station back to the hotel. These are a snip at BBD$2.50 (€1.15). It felt like it was built by the Acme Company from the Warner Brothers cartoons, and we bounced along roads that felt as if they’d been cratered by Wile E. Coyote to trap the Road Runner.
The country’s capital investment has shrunk dramatically since the days when it exported sugar to the world; an industry built on the toil of slaves stolen from Africa. There were ten sugar factories in 19th century Barbados, now there are two.
VERY early on my third morning I awoke to the sound of rain battering the tiles on the balcony. I went out and looked at the waves crashing on the beach as the rain wet my head. Had I gone to bed in Barbados and awoken in Bundoran? I cursed global warming then thought I can’t really complain, I am in Barbados after all — though Bundoran has better bars and bumper cars. The rain soon cleared and I spent a day lazing on the beach.
Most of the non-Bajan accents I heard seemed to originate in some part of Britain or the US. Most, like me, politely decline the offers of trinkets on sale from the ‘vendors’ who patrol the beach. They’re mostly friendly, though persistent and frequently disturb a reverie, but forgive them as they have a living to make.
Early next morning, I set off for the Harrison’s Cave in the central uplands of Barbados.
BBD$60 (€27) and half that for children will get you a tram ride to view the stalactites and stalagmites. On my 150ft descent with ten others, our guide Hyacinth enthusiastically told us how Danish man Ole Sorenson and Anthony Mason rediscovered the cave in 1970. The limestone features took thousands of years to form and we were warned frequently not to touch them as this could negatively alter the ecology of the entire cave. Though this sounded fantastical, I resisted my Father Dougal-esque urge to give one a wee tug.
You can also travel 150ft, underwater this time, on the Atlantis Submarine, which is a trip that leaves from the dock at Saint Michael hourly. This was a mustdo for me and though only 55 minutes long, I was recalling reading 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea as a child and in my element.
It’s a family-friendly affair. The wisecracking crew joke about opening the hatches and making us all swim to shore if we misbehave. One little girl near me on the 48-seater craft swore she saw Dory from the 2016 Disney film dozens of times. I saw sea eels, a myriad of brightly coloured other fish and a shipwreck.
My 10-year-old self kept telling me excitedly that night, ‘I was on a submarine today!’
The Cool Runnings Catamaran Cruise promised a frolic-filled close to my Caribbean trip and it didn’t disappoint.
Three different craft take up to 30 passengers out from Carlisle Wharf on the Bridgetown waterfront. We were welcomed with a drink of our choice on board and after careful instruction, went snorkelling. Inflate that life jacket fully if, like me, you are not the world’s strongest swimmer. This will prevent the embarrassment of being chaperoned in the water like a toddler in a shopping trolley.
IRIGHTED myself, back on board, and dived in again, wearing flippers this time, and swam to the group who were by this time diving to a wreck. Sea turtles flopped and floated near the sea floor. Yes, a mixture of feeds is dropped into the water by the catamaran crew to attract them so they probably have a Pavlovian response to the sound of the catamaran engine. But hey, do you want to say you swam with sea turtles or tut cynically?
Back on board I met Paul Cantley, his wife and their friends, the Briscoes from Glasgow and the north of England respectively. They were with their friends the Padmores who, fortunately for them, reside on the island permanently.
Brexit, Boris and borders were contextualised and batted away in conversation with these delightful people. We agreed that Barbados was a paradise but that Brexit might prove to be hell for all of us and plans were hatched to leave what Barbadians might call ‘the Big Kaduma’ behind.
A visit to an island paradise tends to breed further fantasies and yours is just eight hours away.
TRAVEL FACTS
How to get there: Danny travelled with Virgin Atlantic from Gatwick to Bridgetown, from €449 return, see virginatlantic.
com for flight details. Ryanair flies from Dublin to Gatwick, from €40 return (ryanair.ie).
Where to stay: The Accra Beach Hotel & Spa in Christ Church, rooms from €155, visit accrabeachhotel.com
What to do: Details of guided tours to Harrison’s Cave can be found at harrisonscave.com. You can book your underwater adventure with barbados. atlantissubmarines.com. A highly recommended catamaran cruise can be booked with cool runnings barbados.com