Why men should not be suffering in silence any more
Breaking the taboo of erectile dysfunction by talking
WE may find it difficult to talk about, but erectile dysfunction (ED) is a common problem that is not being discussed — and it’s adversely affecting men’s lives — and those of their partner’s too. A new study has actually found that more than four out of five men say their quality of life has been affected by the problem.
Research from Edelman DxI (Data and Intelligence), commissioned by global healthcare company Viatris, examined attitudes towards erectile dysfunction, revealing that 86% of men and their partners say their quality of life has been impacted due to the condition. In addition, 70% of partners in a relationship with a man experiencing ED admit to worrying about their partner’s ED and want to help them find a solution to it.
The study of 509 men and their partners living in Ireland was carried out by Edelman DXI on behalf of Viatris as part of its Talk ED campaign.
The campaign aims to get men and their partners to talk about erectile dysfunction (ED) in an open and frank manner and to encourage men to find treatment for the symptoms of ED by talking to a healthcare professional.
According to the Viatris study, over half (58%) of men and 54% of partners questioned admit to avoiding sexual activity due to ED. However, three quarters of men and 80% of their partners believe ED is a normal part of life for men. Men experiencing ED are more uncomfortable with it than their partners, with 69% of men saying it’s nothing to be embarrassed by compared to 82% of partners.
According to the HSE, ED can happen for a variety of reasons, including stress, fatigue, anxiety, drinking too much alcohol or can be due to an underlying condition such as diabetes.
However, while partners are less embarrassed by the situation, 72% say it’s a subject that is difficult to address and 93% say it’s a topic that people need more education on the matter.
According to holistic sex therapist Jenny Keane, who is sharing her advice as part of the campaign, erectile dysfunction is one of men’s top sexual concerns, alongside premature ejaculation and low llibido or a lack of desire or interest in sex.
A major issue is our reluctance to talk about it, she explains.
‘The aim of the Talk ED campaign is to encourage men and their partners to discuss erectile dysfunction in an open and honest way. By starting a conversation, we can begin to de-stigmatise and breakdown the taboos associated with the issue,’ she says.
‘Erectile dysfunction is common but education brings understanding and most importantly, options. Men do not need to suffer in silence. The impact on men and their partners due to their silence should not be ignored and it is time we begin to normalise the conversation.
‘Bringing up a conversation about a vulnerable topic can not only bring you closer to a partner but also help alleviate any embarrassment they might have about speaking to a healthcare professional about the condition. Treatment for ED is widely available. Any man with symptoms can speak to a pharmacist about options,’ suggests Jenny.
Jenny has shared some tips for couples when discussing ED:
1) BE EMPATHETIC
‘STRIKE the right tone when you bring up the topic of ED with a partner. Make sure that what you’re saying communicates empathy and you handle the conversation carefully.
‘Bringing up difficult conversation topics can help build trust in a relationship and bring people closer together, but you need to make sure that you approach it in the right way. Timing is everything too — a walk or an activity you are doing together in a quiet place can help to create an environment to talk about sensitive subjects like ED with your partner,’ she says.
2) TAKE A HOLISTIC VIEW
‘Your sexual health is just as important as mental and physical wellbeing and learning simple and effective sexual communications tools can help you and your partner navigate difficult conversations,’ Jenny says. ‘What I mean by sexual communication tools is talking about your desires and boundaries, speak up about what you want from a sexual experience and prioritise your partner’s wishes, desires and feelings as being as important as yours.
‘If anyone has a partner who suffers from ED, refraining from having sex for a while can help start a conversation without the worry of performance anxiety as well,’ she says.
3) IT’S NOT ABOUT ATTRACTION
‘Understand that if your partner experiences ED, it does not have anything to do with his attraction towards you,’ Jenny says.
‘Educating yourself about the condition will help reduce common concerns partners have so that discussions can be approached with openness rather than dissatisfaction.’