Sugar is teaching ’em a lesson

Iwas intrigued by Alan Sugar ordering the remaining contestants to meet him at a primary school on

At first I figured he’d accepted defeat and decided to go back and re-educate his latest bunch of suited twonks from the very beginning.

Then I realised there were only 10 weeks of This Process left. Even the best teachers in Britain would need a bit longer – say, 10 years.

It was actually Sugar’s old school. He’d just brought them there to set the shopping task – to find nine, 70th birthday presents for him, each representing part of his life. That’s where the fun started. Working out which parts of his life they represented.

You can only imagine my disappointment that his request for a pile of bricks was in tribute to his property portfolio and not, as I’d hoped, a nod to his old Amstrad phones. His old technology did get a look in, though. He wanted a vintage Amstrad computer.

This led to some confusion in the boardroom when Alan, before telling Ross Fretten “you’re fired”, lost his rag with the losing team and said: “The computer was a complete and utter farce.” I wasn’t sure whether he was commenting on the team’s performance or simply reading out an early review for old time’s sake.

PS: Quote of the night came from Joanna: “Is Sugar even Jewish?” Blimey, Joanna – do keep up.

Next you’ll be asking how old he was when he left school to start his own business.