Soothe seasonal stress
AH, Christmas... a time of peace on Earth and goodwill to all men. But along with seasonal joy comes a stocking-full of stress.
Two-thirds (67%) of people find Christmas Day stressful and women rate festive stress levels at seven out of 10 with money worries, cooking times and family politics.
So, if your ‘stress-o-meter’ is likely to go into the red zone, read on…
Family traditions are all part of the season. But we can also get into a rut and do things not everyone enjoys, warns Dr Meg Arroll, psychologist on behalf of Healthspan.
This is particularly true as kids get older. It’s less about the event itself, which youngsters may have outgrown, and more about time together. If they are complaining, drop expensive rituals like the panto for something universally appealing – like watching Elf (laughter is a great stress-buster).
Take in what is going on at Christmas, says Dr Monica Cain, psychologist at Nightingale Hospital. “Then tune into any feelings you are experiencing. If those feelings are positive, then congratulate yourself for taking the time to notice and enjoy. If your feelings are negative (stress, anxiety, worry), ask yourself what one thing you could change to alleviate the situation.”
Have seasonal treats such as a romantic meal or a family walk on a frosty day to stay connected with the joy of Christmas, suggests Dr Arroll. “Doing something different will help you keep a sense of perspective as the pressure mounts later on.”
Asking for help isn’t an admission of failure and makes everyone feel involved. This year, enjoy Christmas rather than just survive it.
Practise this phrase, “I could do with some help…” Give jobs to the people who’ll enjoy them, set some (realistic) deadlines – and don’t interfere! Find ways to cut the time spent with those who make you unhappy, says Mark Griffiths, professor of behavioural addiction at Nottingham Trent University. “You may not be able to change your family’s dynamics, but at least be aware of how your family can affect your psychological mood state.” Be aware of your stress triggers and have a strategy for coping, suggests Dr Arroll. For example, “If my brother-in-law starts to wind me up, I will make an excuse to leave the room for a while.” Mark says: “Basically, do anything where you have to interact with each other. Even making the Christmas dinner could be a communal activity where each adult and child has a specific job.”
Stress can arise just because there is a houseful of people and little ‘me’ time, warns Mark. Find a moment to do something on your own.
“Immerse yourself in a warm bath and take advantage of this little therapeutic sanctuary in your home,” suggests Julia Haywood, technical director at Tisserand Aromatherapy (tisserand.com). “Light some candles and add bath oil.”
However stressful your family is, it is always good to be grateful, advises Mark. “Remember that the Christmas feelings of joy and happiness come not from the gifts, decorations, food and drink, but from our relationships with other people.
“If we make our close relationships the top priority, then the rest of the Christmas should fall naturally into place.” Be choosy about music: “Music has a positive effect on the brain and body, and can lower blood pressure,” explains
Julia. If frazzled, avoid Jingle Bells and Slade
– stick with Michael Bublé instead!
Eat your sprouts: They’re a great source of vitamins, antioxidants and also magnesium. A lack of this is linked to increased anxiety.
Name breeds of dog: This ‘grounding’ technique helps reduce anxious thoughts. “Grounding acts as a distraction from overthinking and it occupies your mind,” says psychologist Dr Meg Arroll. Listing, say, ice cream flavours, also works, but so can puzzles or playing solitaire.
Smell citrus: Researchers say that certain citrus fragrances boost wellbeing and alleviate stress by upping levels of norepinephrine, a hormone that affects mood. Savour peeling a satsuma. Pucker up under the mistletoe: Kissing can reduce tension and anxiety because it lowers the stress hormone cortisol and increases feel-good oxytocin. And the more we kiss and acknowledge our partners, the better it is for our relationship.
Research shows that heart rates rise by 33% while Christmas shopping – on par with running a marathon. Search for deals online and browse in bite-size chunks to avoid stress.
“Beware of using wine to wind down,” advises Dr Arroll. Surrounded by festive tipples, it’s only too tempting, but regular drinking raises stress levels and reduces sleep quality, she warns. “Bad sleep is not only a symptom of stress, it is also a cause of it,” says Neil Shah of The Stress Management Society. He suggests a few early nights each week, and investing in a sleep mask and earplugs.