SHE DUMPED ME FOR DAUGHTER

Dear Coleen

I’m a man in my mid-60s and a couple of years ago I met a wonderful woman who I thought would be my partner for life.

We even moved in together and I thought we were happy.

However, a few months ago, her daughter had a baby and out of the blue, she told me she wanted to move to be nearer her, so she could help out and get to know her grandson.

She has been very clear that our relationship is over and I’m devastated about it.

I simply didn’t expect to be in this position, it came as a massive shock to me.

Have you any words of wisdom to help me cope?

Coleen says

When a relationship ends it doesn’t matter how long in the tooth you are or how many times you’ve been around the block, it still hurts and it takes time to get over. So you can’t expect to wake up tomorrow feeling great.

You will feel bad for a while, but don’t cut yourself off from friends and family – lean on them and say yes to every invite you get. Sometimes distraction and keeping yourself busy is the best way to heal. And, one day, you will wake up and not feel so bad.

It won’t feel like it now, but you can (and will) find happiness again and, if you want to meet someone else, there’s still time to do that.

I’ve had many letters over the years from people older than you who’ve found fulfilling relationships, as well as new friends and interests. But don’t put too much pressure on yourself – you need to be ready.

Perhaps once some time has passed (and the novelty of a new baby wears off), your ex will realise what she’s given up and want to give things another go, but don’t put your life on hold in the meantime.