I had my head in Russell Brand's lap... I thought I'd gone to heaven
First time on the silver screen
Pauline and Linda in Junket 89 in 1970 WE all went along to Anna’s because it was like a youth club. But then we got casting directors coming down because they liked that we were real kids, we weren’t jazz-hand stage school kids. So if they were doing something gritty, they came to us.
I was there with Pauline, who I knew because she lived near my nan, the Kemp brothers, Martin and Gary, Kathy Burke, Gillian Taylforth, so many names.
The first big job was Junket 89 for the Saturday Morning Pictures. When it came out, my mum took about 20 kids and I down to the Carlton cinema.
They were all cheering every time I came on! It is funny to watch now. We’ve got such high squeaky voices and it just looks like I’m overacting! Around then I had to open a bank account. I was the first in my family to open one. None of my family had one.
Teenage TV kicks
WE were just 16 when we did Pauline’s Quirkes, a firstof-its-kind magazine show for teens, at Teddington. It was great fun because we had all these big bands on – Flintlock and Bay City Rollers.
There were so many big names strolling around the studios. I remember having lunch in the canteen with Benny Hill. Everyone used to say he was mean, but he wasn’t. He’d say to us: “I’ll get it, girls!”
The show was ahead of its time. We did an item about the importance of signing up for donor cards and we got lots of calls – but most were complaining that we’d been allowed on TV with Cockney accents!
My daughter fails to Shine...
Lauren with Nan (Elizabeth Spriggs) I WAS pregnant with Lauren, now 34, while on Shine On Harvey Moon and bosses decided to write her in. She was about nine months when they asked her to play the neighbour’s baby. It meant loads of scenes but she did not take to it at all! She took an instant dislike to Elizabeth Spriggs, who played Nan, and cried her head off the entire time. And because she was crying I started crying. It was a disaster. And that was Lauren’s one and only foray into acting!
Shedding the Cockney accent
WHEN I got good reviews for my Belfast accent for Harry’s Game, I thought to myself: “That’s good, I’ll start doing other accents as well the Cockney”. Well... that never happened!
I was on The Other ‘Arf with
Lorraine Chase (pictured right) when I was asked to go in for
Shine on Harvey Moon.
Then Pauline came to visit and the bosses saw us having a drink, loved our chemistry, and said they wanted to do a show with us.
They’d overheard two women talking about their husbands being inside. So they’d come up with a show about two sisters.
The first Birds of a Feather show
Linda, Lesley Joseph and Pauline Quirke PAULINE and I got the bus to the set together for the first show of Birds of a Feather. We joked all the way that we’d rather be in child labour or the dentist than on the way to a live filming!
After the recording the bosses said: “We think you’ve got a hit on your hands here girls!” And they were right. The reaction was phenomenal.
Almost overnight, everywhere we went we were recognised. It’s the same now. During the tour in 2012, we’d go to a supermarket and split up. If people spotted us together we’d never get out! My six-year-old granddaughter Lila has just cottoned onto it. She’s like: “Mummy, tell ‘em who nanna is!”
We got 25 million viewers at one time and lots of awards, which I keep in the garage! But just working together is everything. The poor director. He just can’t get us to stop talking sometimes. Our lunchbreaks go on for ever.
Our favourite episodes
WE especially loved the specials. We did one in LA, with George Hamilton and George Wendt from Cheers, and there we were at The Ivy next to Sly Stallone and Shirley Maclaine having lunch! All the crew would be extras in the Christmas specials as well, which made it special. We’ve still got some of the same crew now – it’s such a big family. We all often send food to the homeless shelter near where we film – but we got complaints because there wasn’t enough vegetarian!
Lesley, Pauline and I also put forward a lot of our own ideas to the writers because they don’t know women like we know women. We know about the menopause, so we put HRT patches in some scenes, and there’s a moment where I’m plucking my chin and no one mentions it. We also insisted on Tracey getting skin cancer as one in four women now get cancer. That’s one of our favourites of one of the series we’ve just done.
I reckon we’ll end with them all in an old people’s home. Miss Joseph would have the posh room with someone coming in doing her hair and nails and we’d be the forgotten two down the end of the corridor! SHE was just 10 when she had her very first role.
But now after turning 60 last month, Linda Robson is celebrating another anniversary as well – a huge 50 years in showbiz.
Born in Islington, North London, she I LOVE Russell Brand. Pauline had worked with him and got him to send me a photo.
I was on Jonathan Ross with him. He put my head on his lap and was rubbing my hair. I thought I’d died and gone to heaven! He’s half my was one of the original Anna Scher Theatre schoolkids.
It was there she began a friendship that would change British comedy, when she became best friends with Pauline Quirke.
Over the next five decades Linda appeared in top shows from Harry’s Game and Shine on Harvey Moon to I’m A Celebrity and Loose
Meeting my crushes
age and though he looks like he needs a wash, he smells gorgeous. You feel invisible when you get to a certain age but he didn’t make me feel invisible. He’s so lovely – and a bit naughty! I also got Michael Buble
n. Yet it was Birds of a Feather role as Tracey Stubbs that rockr to one of our national treasgetting
naughty with Russell to having a massage from Michael Buble, here Linda shares her favourite showbiz moments.
Drinking with the A List
I LOVE doing theatre. I was doing Telstar in the West End and one night the doorman said: “There’s someone big in tonight.” I said: “Yeah, Neil and Christine Hamilton.” And he said “No, Big!”
After I’d finished I looked and it was Tom Hanks! He came backstage with some wine and was chatting about how much he had enjoyed it.
Another time I was doing Food Chain at The Royal Court and Kevin Spacey came backstage. I was with my son Louis who was about eight and he went: “Are you who I think? I just saw you in Se7en.” I glared at him and went: “When did you watch Se7en? It’s really violent!” I was furious and Kevin stood there laughing while we had a row!
The things I put myself through..
MY husband only knew
I’d signed for I’m A Celeb a week before I went in.
He was worried I’d get homesick, so we had a code where I’d say
“Cuck-oo” on air so he knew I was OK. Soon all the campmates were doing it!
The best bit about it was the detox. I’ve never looked as gorgeous as when I left the jungle – the diet had made my skin glow and I’d lost weight!
It was less glamorous when I did Grumpy Old Women doing Let’s Dance For Comic Relief as Lady Gaga. Jenny Eclair and I trained for four weeks and I still couldn’t do the moves. I think we only got to the final three as I voted for us so many times!
Taking the Plunge on Loose Women
THERE are times when I wish I’d been more careful in the Loose Women green room! After the producers heard me saying I regretted not doing the skydive on I’m A Celeb, they organised it for my 60th birthday.
They kept changing the dates after I’d geared myself up for it. I was up all night the night before, going to the toilet because I was worrying. When the crew said there was a chance it might get postponed again, I went “No! If I’m not doing it today, I’m not doing it.” The fear that day will never leave me!
I have such a good time on Loose Women. I get to do some great interviews. One of the best was Ricky Martin... I had to get into bed with him.