I NEVER SEE MY PAL NOW SHE’S A MUM

Dear Coleen

My best friend had a baby a few months ago and now I rarely see her. These days, she seems to spend all her time with other mums she’s met through baby groups and, unless I call her, we never speak.

I don’t want to sound needy and childish, but I’m feeling a bit neglected! I’m still single and don’t have kids, so I suppose she might feel she can’t talk to me about all the mum stuff.

I really miss her, but I’m not sure whether to say anything, as I might come across as jealous or pathetic.

Please help!

Coleen says

If this is your friend’s first baby, then it will be all-consuming and it is good to spend time with other new mums who understand what you’re going through and can share experiences and advice. It’s a big life change and it’s full on!

I just think you might need to give her a bit of time to adjust to being a parent. You probably have more chance of seeing her if you offer to go over there, as leaving the house with a newborn – and taking everything with you bar the kitchen sink – can be a major operation for anyone.

And I think you should say something – not in an angry or accusatory way, but just admit you miss her company and wondered if you could hatch some plans to spend time together, even if it’s just a walk in the park with the buggy and a takeaway coffee to catch up on each other’s news.

Your friend will get back to normal soon enough and, when she does, she’ll probably be glad of a friend who wants to avoid all the baby talk.