I DON’T WANT SISTER AS A GODMOTHER

Dear Coleen

My husband and I had a baby a few months ago and we have a baptism booked, but we’re struggling over who to pick as godparents.

I don’t get on with my husband’s sister – she’s never been very nice to me and is extremely competitive.

However, her husband is a great guy and I’d really like him to be a godfather.

My brother would be the other godfather, and the godmothers will be two of my single friends.

My husband worries his sister will hit the roof and thinks we should have couples to keep the peace, while I think it’s important to choose the best people, regardless of whether they’re in a couple or related. Can you help?

Coleen says

I don’t think you have to stick to couples. I agree that it’s about choosing people who you feel will be a consistent and caring presence in your child’s life.

I’m not sure why your husband is so keen to keep his sister sweet, plus he could always say that he got to choose the godfathers and you chose the godmothers to put an end to any debate (and get himself off the hook!).

If you don’t get along that well with your sister-in-law, then she probably doesn’t expect to get asked. You reap what you sow and, in this case, it means being left off the godparent list!

There’s no reason to be unpleasant or fall out over it, but you have to do what you think is best for your child and everyone else will just have to accept the decision and get on with it.

Maybe your sister-in-law will feel snubbed, but maybe it’ll also be a bit of a wake-up call to be a bit friendlier in the future.