CHEATING HUBBY WANTS TO MOVE BACK IN

My husband left me about six months ago for another woman. I was heartbroken at the time and it’s taken a lot to pick up the pieces of my life.

Last week he got in touch to say he’s leaving her and wants to come home to me and our two kids. I want to say yes because I’ve missed him so much and still love him, but I’m worried he’ll do it again and I’m still hurt and devastated by what he did.

I haven’t told anyone else, not even my family, because I know they wouldn’t approve of me taking him back. What do you think? Am I crazy to agree to it?

Coleen says

I think it’s crazy to agree to it instantly. If he wants to come home and you want him to come home, then take it slowly. You could see each other away from the house and then it could progress to him staying over the odd night.

I think it’s a mistake to let him just waltz back in because, yes, initially, there might be a honeymoon period, but your issues and insecurities will still be there and you need to confront them and start to work through them slowly.

If you avoid talking about what happened, every time his phone rings or he’s home late from work, you’re going to worry.

You also have to consider the kids – you don’t want him to move in, only for him to move back out three weeks later.

You’ve been very hurt and it’s a big thing that’s happened – he was with this other woman for six months and they lived together too.

I’d suggest counselling, where there are boundaries and he has to listen to you.

But don’t not try because of other people. Naturally they’ll be worried because they’ve seen the devastation he left behind, but they don’t know him or love him like you do, and it’s your life.