The First rule for Dates? Let the other person speak
.. and don’t talk politics, get drunk, split bill or go out with less than € 200!
HE’S the sexiest man in the First Dates restaurant – but unlike the contestants, Mateo Saina is not looking for romance.
The sharp- dressed Maitre D, whose on- screen charisma is a big part of the RTE show’s success, is a family man who hasn’t been on the dating scene in 15 years.
However, over nine seasons of watching couples interact in Dublin’s Gibson Hotel restaurant where the series is shot, the 40- year- old has learned a lot about dating.
From watching dates take off, or die, he knows what to do to impress.
And he doesn’t hold back on what NOT to do when you’re out with a potential love match.
The golden r ules according to Mateo are: Don’t get drunk, don’t talk politics and don’t split the bill.
OPPORTUNITIES
Don’t talk politics... if the other person doesn’t share your opinion, you’re doomed MATEO SAINA
YESTERDAY
Ahead of Valentine’s Day next week, Mateo tol d the Iri sh Mirror the secrets to getting a “Yes” to a second date.
The straight- talking Croatian said: “From what I ’v e seen , the most important thing is to let the other person speak.
“A s k q u e s t i o n s t h a t l e a v e opportunities f or them to speak about themselves. What not to do is – don’t get drunk.
“Don’t be too self- obsessed , all about ‘ Me, me, me’.
“Don’t talk about politics, don’t discuss Gaza and Ukraine, because if the other person doesn’t share your opinion, you’re doomed.
“Don’t go for tricky topics, st ay i n the safe zone. The tricky topics can come in the third or fourth date.
“Don’t get drunk, drinking to feel more confident does not cut it. For me anyway, I l i ke s omeone who i s composed.”
A big “no- no” for Mateo is splitting the bill. He says don’t go on a date if you can’t af ford to pay for the meal. He personally b e l i e v e s t h e man should always get it on the first date. But he says i t doesn’t real ly matter who pays – as long as it’s not divided up.
Mateo added: “It’s my opinion that even if the date doesn’t go well, from the male point of view, you pay the bill and off you go.
“Very rarely, when the date is going right, the lady picks up the bill – so OK, that could be a nice gesture.
“There can be a discussion around feminism and thi s, that and the other. You will hear, ‘ We are able to pay for our own bill’ and yes, we know that. But you can pay the next one. Let me do my thing and I ’ ll feel good about it and next time, you can pay.
“You can be equal and no one is losing and we both win.
“But splitting the bill – a no- no. ‘ Should we split the bill?’ What do you mean, should we split it?” he scoffed. “That is proper stingy.
“It’s like being out with a group of teachers on a work night out and discussing who had what.
“It’s a stupid situation from people who never go out. It is saying, ‘ I don’t have enough in my pocket, I don’t appreciate you enough’. It’s a person who doesn’t fit in a restaurant – a person with more issues besides not paying the bill.
“That person has an issue, if you ask me. Maybe I am being too brutal, but it’s a big red f lag.”
He said a night out now costs a standard € 200.
“You won’t get out for dinner and drinks, with taxis, without spending that. It’s pretty simple, if you don’t have that, what the f*** are you doing out?
“You’re going to get exposed and all your macho games will be out t h e window.” One of t h e most controversial episodes of this series featured Ciaran and Hansun, whose date was painfully awkward.
Ciaran was unhappy with the match and made his feelings very clear throughout. However, he took the tab at the end.
Said Mateo: “That’s a power move. Even if you hated it, that’s the last laugh. It’s a proper slap. It’s saying: ‘ I’d rather give this € 100 and never see you again.’”
INSTINCT
One of the big faux pas on First Dates is love matches talking about ex- boyfriends or girlfriends.
But Mateo i s forgiving on that,
My opinion is even if the date doesn’t go well, man should pay .. don’t split MATEO SAINA
YESTERDAY
saying it’s an instinct of younger people trying to show they have experience.
He added: “That’s a generational thing. It ’s more common i n people aged 18 to 25 because they’re stating, ‘ I am able t o have s omebody but the last person annoyed me – so here I am’.
“I used to do it too and it’s silly. But it’s some people’s way of saying, ‘ I could have a relationship, but I ’m out now and here for grabs’.
“It’s trying to prove you’re cool and a lack of knowledge about life, but life experience takes a bit of time.”
Mateo has his fair share of female admirers – both in the restaurant and among viewers at home – but he doesn’t buy into it. He said: “It’s just TV, I never understood it, to be honest.
“It’s never made me think something extra about myself. I ’m not better than anyone and no one is better than me. A lot are interested just because I am on TV.
“I never l acked f or att ention when younger but what puts me off is [ asking myself ] would you notice me if I was not on television? If I was j ust another guy working in a restaurant?”
He has littl e time f or those who wonder i f his f li rting i s anything more than fun. Mateo added: “I ’m a family man and have been with the same lady [ fiancee Vjerana, the mother of his daughter Isabelle
Luna and son Noah] and
I am still in love with her. What am I going to do? Have cheeky s e x a n d a g u i l t y conscience for 10 years? I don’t need this in my life. What is any other woman going to do for me that my lady of 15 years is not gonna do for me? Absolutely nothing.
“They could try their best and I would laugh. But it’s true.”
He says he has the nicest role on television but admits: “The reality can be different.
“People think I am nice, but try to be rude to me and you’ll regret the day you met me. I take no bulls** t.”
■ First Dates continues tonight on RTE Two at 9.30pm.