Eddie’s trophy dreams fade to black again

EDDIE HOWE has as much chance of lifting a trophy this season as Christopher Biggins of winning an Oscar for Best Actor.

Newcastle boss Howe’s season was never going to be defined by a Monday night excursion down the Fulham Broadway when there is the small matter of an FA Cup quarterfinal at Manchester City on Saturday.

But with Hollywood actor Adam Sandler (below) in the posh seats at Stamford Bridge, it felt like a good night to measure the stardust.

If both sides kicked off the season with high hopes of top-four finishes, the quality was mid-table… and the table doesn’t lie. For their practice walk along the red carpet before their live audition at the Etihad, Toon fought hard not to fluff their lines.

And on a ground where they had won just once in 28 Premier League visits, Sven Botman’s weak clearance and Nicolas Jackson’s instinctive finish after just six minutes was straight from a horror film.

Then Magpies winger Anthony Gordon, one of the names on England coach Gareth Southgate’s watching brief, was forced off injured after 35 minutes.

But when Howe (top) needed his depleted warriors to dig in, at least they summoned the willpower to make it a contest instead of a luvvies’ procession.

Alexander Isak became only the third Newcastle striker, after Alan Shearer and Dwight Gayle, to score home and away against Chelsea in the same Prem season.

And if Tino Livramento looks an England full-back of the future, the future starts now. But Howe’s job security never seems more than a couple of defeats away from forensic scrutiny in the house of Geordie Arabia.

Somehow he must plot a route to Europe next term to feel safe, but away from home he finds it harder to catch a break than the tide across the causeway to Holy Island up the Northumberland coast.