Egging each other on and claiming a slice of the victory

THE arguing started in the car on the way home from the show.

“Of course, it was my idea to enter them,” the mother (M) kicked off.

“I feed the hens every day,” asserted the elder daughter (D1).

“I feed them sometimes, too… and I give them bread during the day,” the younger daughter piped up (D2).

“I feed them during the school year,” said M.

“And I feed them when ye’re all away,” the father (F) joined in. Short silence.

“It was my idea to get hens in the first place,” said D2, a deepthinking 10-year-old.

“Well, I was the one who put up the run for them, and later extended it,” F asserted.

“We fixed up their coop last year,” said D1.

“…And painted it,” added D2. “I was the one who bought the paint,” said M.

Short silence.

“I cleaned out from them last week,” said D1.

“I usually do it,” said M.

“I help sometimes too,” said D2. “And I play with them.”

“I grew the straw that ye use to bed them,” said F. Another short silence. “Well, we were the ones who picked out the new hens, and brought them all the way home from Kilmallock mart,” said D2.

“When you say brought them home, do you mean on your back or just in the car?” asked F.

“Actually, Father, you shouldn’t be claiming any credit, because your big old red hen isn’t even laying,” said D2.

There was nothing F could say to this, so M drove on again: “It was my idea to exhibit the eggs in a basket.”

“Well, I’m the one who actually arranged them,” said D1.

“It was my basket,” said M. “Again, it was my straw in it,” said F, keeping up the game.

“I said that some of them needed to be washed,” said M.

“I was the one who washed them,” said the ever-practical D1.

“It was my idea that you would go through them every day during the week and see if any of the freshly-laid ones worked better,” said M.

“Well, I’m the one who actually selected the eggs,” said D1.

“I collect eggs sometimes too,” said D2.

Sometimes, everyone minutely connected to a victory tries to claim a slice of credit for it.

“Well, you wouldn’t be there at all if it wasn’t for me — I birthed you,” said M, mischievously.

“I had something to do with it, too,” declared F.

“Well, actually, it was the doctors and nurses who did the work,” said D2.

“Just think,” said M, “as far as anyone outside this car knows, we’re a normal family.” Everyone laughed.

The talk then took a different direction.

“But there were an awful lot of entries weren’t there, how many?” asked F.

“17, I think,” replied D1. “Oh, wow!” said F.

“I’d say that was more than any other class in the whole section,” said D2.

“So really that makes them the best hen eggs across the entire Ossory region,” said F.

“And you were probably the youngest person in it,” said D2, who can’t help venerating her elder sister. “And how much do you win?”

“€8,” said D1.

“What do you think made your entry stand out?” asked F.

“Well, other eggs were browner, and there were white ones, and speckled ones and bigger ones… maybe it was that they were well matched,” said D1.

The mother had the last word, as usual: “No matter what you do for the rest of your life, no one can take from you that Sarah Talbot won Class 160, ‘Best Hen Eggs’, at the 120th anniversary Ossory Show in Rathdowney, on July 22, 2018.”

Congrats to all who contributed to making the event a fantastic success.

IT WAS MY IDEA THAT YOU WOULD GO THROUGH THEM EVERY DAY DURING THE WEEK