Irish Independent

F***ing Fabulous by Tom Ford

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Eeuh… what’s that funny smell?

Are you referring to the “subtle aroma of almond bitter oil, tonka resinoid, orris accord, cashmeran, leather accord and clary sage oil?”

Eh, possibly…

It’s F***ing Fabulous, darling. Thank you for noticing. I had a squirt just before you arrived.

I beg your pardon?

You’re seriously not au fait with the blockbuste­r new fragrance from Tom Ford? Hashtag mortified!

I’ve never been so embarrasse­d.

Well, you’re too late to get on board the bandwagon. F***ing Fabulous has been an instant sell-out worldwide. You’ll have to find something else to spend €260 on.

Could you please stop with the f-bombs. You’re making my ears bleed.

Someone needs to chill the f*** out. F*** is the coolest word of the season. Just read the blockbuste­r self-help manual The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A F***. Or what

about Unf*** Yourself: Get Out Of Your Head And Into Your Life? F***ing amazing.

I think I’m good, thanks.

Or what about I F***ing Love Science…?

Oh yeah — the completely condescend­ing website where it is implied that if you don’t “f***ing love science” — and bang on about it constantly — then you’re a creationis­t red-neck who thinks Jesus hung out with dinosaurs.

That’s the one — although there’s a fear that, with all the ‘f’ words flying about, we have arrived at the point of overkill. When does a grassroots meme become a gimmick etc? The theory is that we’ve reached peak f-bomb and that the only way is down.

Thank feck for that.

Woah, no need to lower the tone.

 ??  ?? Rude awakening: Tom Ford’s F***ing Fabulous
Rude awakening: Tom Ford’s F***ing Fabulous

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