How drama in a Thai cave can help teach us all about the complex design of real rescue
THE news that 12 children and their young soccer coach have been found safe and well in a cave in Thailand is welcome throughout the world.
We can only imagine the euphoria that the boys’ families experienced when the word first came through.
Now, sadly, we learn that one volunteer has died in his efforts to support the rescue. The challenge of bringing the boys safely to the surface has become even more difficult.
We might wonder how the 13 are going to spend this ‘in between’ time. Yes, they are safe but they are far removed from their normal lives.
Just think about it – no sitting down to meals with families or friends; no participation with activities that were so much part of their daily lives two weeks ago; no space to be alone and no privacy. What might they be thinking as they prepare to leave the cave?
The journey to safety is not certain and is likely to be difficult.
Perhaps we know, in a way that they do not yet appreciate, that assuming the rescue is successful, as we all hope and pray it will be, they will not be returning to life as they knew it. Instead, they will each become celebrities.
They will be photographed and interviewed. Complete strangers will want to be close to them. Books will be written about them and probably at least one film will be made. Families will be so thrilled to have them home safe, they may struggle with ever letting them go away again.
Kian Kamluang, whose 16-yearold son, Pornchai, is in the cave, said: “It’s like he has been given a new life,” , adding that she’ll never let her son go into a cave or near water again.
I thought of the boys recently when I reflected on the desire many of us have to rescue others.
We often have very good reasons for this. We see others who seem to be lost.
Some have backed themselves into a cave where they feel safe and do not want to leave. It can be difficult, if not impossible, for us to understand this.
Why would they not want to improve their situation? Why do they not let us pull, push or drag them to the surface? What is the attraction of the cave? Why do they want to distance themselves from us in the first place?
Surely, they know that we have their best interests at heart?
The tragic death of one of the volunteers highlights again how essential it is to give from what we have to give.
It would seem insane if one or more of the boys in Thailand asked to be allowed to stay in their cave. They are all probably thrilled that they have been found and are eagerly waiting to be literally brought to the surface.
There is something we can learn from how careful those in charge of the rescue are in planning the next stage of the rescue.
While they might be under pressure to whisk the boys to the surface, they are aware that this is not the right thing to do.
It is too dangerous, with the possibility that the boys could be harmed rather than saved. We have been told that it could take up to four months before the boys are reunited with their families.
They have been given food and shelter. Arrangements are being made for them to communicate with people outside their cave. They have been checked out by doctors and we know that they will receive whatever medical treatment they require and that is possible for them to receive.
They also will receive training to equip them in joining in the rescue operation as active participants. This may require them to learn basic diving skills.
We can hope that they will also
The journey out of our own caves can be difficult, too. It can be tempting to want to retreat, to hide and to even want to give up. Action can be a struggle. Accepting help can be painful, particularly if it is perceived as criticism or judgment
receive training which will prepare them for the onslaught of the world media and for the future that eagerly awaits them.
There is an urgency as rain continues to fall. The trapped boys are safe right now, but there is no guarantee that water levels will not rise, causing them to be in danger.
We know that we cannot wait until the boys decide that they feel equipped enough to leave the relative safety of their cave. Their journey to safety will be fraught with risk.
We know that it is worth it and we wish them well every single step of the way. The journey out of our own caves can be difficult too. It can be tempting to want to retreat, to hide and to even want to give up.
Action can be a struggle. Accepting help can be too painful, particularly if it is perceived as criticism or judgment.
What would it be like if we allowed others to find us, appreciated the genuine care and love they have for us and work with them to get ourselves out from where we are stuck, into a world that is waiting for us? Dr Claire Hayes is a clinical psychologist, educational psychologist, lecturer, author and researcher and is Clinical Director with Aware