What every parent should know about online bullying and image sharing
It’s every parent’s worst nightmare. The loss of a child is heartbreaking under any circumstances, but the thought that someone you know — your child — took their own life to escape the torture of bullying is distressing beyond belief. This is what happened to Jackie Fox. Her daughter Nicole, known as ‘Coco’, died by suicide in January 2018. She was just 21 years of age and had suffered years of online bullying.
After her death, Jackie made it her mission to change the laws around online harm. In December 2020, the Harassment, Harmful Communications and Related Offences Act, known as Coco’s Law, was enacted.
Coco’s Law is an essential piece of legislation. Nearly one in six young teenagers were cyberbullied in 2022, according to the new World Health Organisation Europe report. This is an increase from 13pc just four years ago. The study identifies that the Covid pandemic changed how teenagers treat and behave towards each other. Sadly, this comes as little surprise to those of us working with young people.
Children today grow up faster than previous generations and the ever-evolving online world adds to the pressure on them and their parents.
Children and young people tell us their concerns through our 24/7 Childline listening service, through our therapeutic services and through our Shield Anti-Bullying programme.
It can be difficult or embarrassing to broach certain subjects with your child, but open communication is crucial.
In addition to cyberbullying, Coco’s Law also covers the sharing of intimate images. The age of criminal responsibility in Ireland is 12 years which means that the offences under Coco’s Law apply to children aged 12 and over.
When it comes to the sharing of intimate images, as well as being open to potential sextortion (the sharing of intimate images, clips or information and online bullying), it’s important that young people know that the sharing of any intimate image of another minor could be classified as child sexual abuse material.
As adults, we know the many risks involved in posting pictures online or sending intimate images. Your child may think they are simply sharing pictures with trusted friends or loved ones, but it’s important they understand that some online ‘friends’ may actually be strangers.
Those once closest to our children can hurt them the most. Many young people have found themselves the victim of intimate image sharing for nefarious reasons, which is the distribution of sexually explicit images or videos of people without their consent. This is a horrific betrayal of trust.
If your child comes to you and says they have sent intimate images (or received them), try to stay as calm as possible. This will help your child to regulate their heightened emotions.
When the crisis is over, you can then take the time to reflect on what your child has learned from the incident and can put a plan together of how they can keep themselves safe. Validate
your child’s feelings and ask for their input in trying to find a solution.
A joint solution will make it far more likely that your child will come to you again should anything else happen. They need to know they can always come to you about anything and you will always be there to support them.
Reports of serious incidents can be made to An Garda Síochána and Hotline.ie, the Irishbased internet watchdog.
Fiona Jennings is ISPCC Head of Policy and Public Affairs. Additional words by Siobhan Harvey, ISPCC Parenting Lead. ISPCC is offering a free webinar on Coco’s Law and the sharing of intimate images on April 30 at 7pm. To find out more about the event, please go to ispcc.ie.