Quotes of the week

I’m not that stupid Prince Charles vows to stop meddling when he finally becomes king

Sorry I’m late! Record breaker Ross Edgley arrives back in Kent after swimming the 1,791 mile British coastline in 157 days. He thought it would take 100

Everybody who does a stressful job needs a way to switch off, mine’s Lego Culture Secretary Jeremy Wright reveals his passion for building Lego models, including a 4,500 piece Star Wars’ Death Star

I am a young god... I’m in great shape and I want this to be recognised Dutchman Emile Ratelband, 69, wants to wipe 20 years off his official age – in the same way transgender people change sex – to help find love on dating app Tinder

There isn’t one law for the famous and one for the rest of the community High Court judge Mr Justice Mostyn ticks off Ant Mcpartlin for failing to attend his divorce case

I said ‘I can’t kiss you, can I?’ And he said ‘No, you don’t’ Actress Emma Thompson fails to break convention while receiving her damehood from Prince William

You are a rude, terrible person Donald Trump loses his cool with CNN’S Jim Acosta after the reporter refuses to hand back his microphone at a White House press conference

Life will certainly seem longer Tory MP Desmond Swayne on government advice that we should drink less and exercise more

Who wants all this newfangled 4K Ultra HD, satellite dishes or a screen that’s bigger than your room when you can have glorious black and white TV? TV and radio historian Jeffrey Borinsky is not surprised by news that 7,161 people still have a black and white set