Time to treat ours-elves
THE Elves on the Shelves have been taking pride of place on our mantelpiece... since mid-november.
My pair were appalled to hear Santa’s little helpers don’t actually come to life until December 1.
Their excitement is infectious waiting for elf action. Last year our elf was a dab hand at cleaning.
The girls found him strewn in the sink with a bottle of Cif in his hand.
Another time he got up to all sorts of mischief ripping up loo roll, leaving a trail of tissue behind him on the stairs.
I almost stuck my head in with the flour last year when I pretended our elf had attempted to make a cake one evening, I was that exhausted.
This year I’m obliged to come up with novel ways to place not one but two elves each night – we had one last year but now we have Sparkles and Sprinkles.
I’m already cursing the elves’ shenanigans for fear I forget to move the little fellas. We have to remember, without these little fellas it would be harder to bribe our kids to behave. Plus, how much longer will we get out of it?
It’s like cursing doing the school run daily, only to realise they’ll be walking on their own by age 10 and won’t want you embarrassing them holding their hand.
Already my seven-year-old is quizzing me on how realistic it is that one jolly man can deliver presents to every child in the world.
The magic won’t last forever, so when experts start telling us we shouldn’t bribe our kids with the naughty or nice mantra I crack up.
The elves don’t move if you’re naughty and they report all bad behaviour to the big man in red. This stuff is genius.
Even if the child psychologists don’t agree, most parents I know love a good bribe.
Studies have shown that material possessions don’t bring happiness.
But it’s not the materialism of Santa coming down the chimney that kids love, it’s the magic that elves and the big man conjure up.
My lot are only asking for one item and a surprise; it’s not about the size of the toy, it’s about wonderment. Kids reignite magic in us, so what’s the harm?