THE SEX Sun, sand and loved-up time in Dubai has Gunners firing again after festive flops

The final say from the Emirates

BRAZILIAN legend Romario once told Gabriel Jesus that his secret for scoring goals was having more sex.

So perhaps it will turn out to be a stroke of genius that Mikel Arteta (below) allowed his players to take their wives and partners on Arsenal’s winter break to Dubai?

After a festive meltdown which saw Arteta’s team fall spectacularly from the summit of the Premier League and crash out of the FA Cup, the last thing the Gunners could afford was to fire any more blanks.

A bit of R&R with loved ones in the Arabian sunshine seems to have done the trick.

Five goals and a comfortable stroll at the Emirates was just the kind of thing Arsenal needed after their Christmas from hell.

To be fair, Arteta himself could not have handpicked better opponents after going three games without a win in the Prem.

If any more evidence was needed that Roy Hodgson’s time at Crystal Palace might be up, it was the sight of Arsenal’s Brazilian defender Gabriel twice steaming in at the far post to connect with headers that put his team two goals up inside 37 minutes.

Gabriel might be a little peeved the second goal was credited to Dean Henderson given that the ball was destined for the back of the net anyway before it struck the unsuspecting Palace keeper on the rear of the head and bounced in.

Conceding goals from basic set-piece corners will drive the Palace manager mad.

Leandro Trossard then gave a devastating Jesus-led counter-attack the finish it richly deserved just before the hour.

And Gabriel Martinelli came off the substitutes’ bench to complete the rout with an assured stoppage-time double that saw him cut in to find the same bottom corner of the Palace goal twice.

The issue that Arteta really needs to address if he is going to deliver on his team’s potential is getting more goals.

Arsenal had just 37 in 20 games before Palace rolled over; 11 fewer than Manchester City; six fewer than both Liverpool and Aston Villa. The fact Bukayo

Saka is at the top of the club’s Premier League goal charts with just six, illustrates where their weakness lies. But recruiting an antidote to Erling Haaland, Mo Salah or even Ollie Watkins would come at a price. Just don’t talk to Hodgson about Arteta’s ‘first-world problems’. Only the most one-eyed Arsenal fanatic and those travelling supporters who booed the Palace team off at half-time wouldn’t feel sympathy for the 76-year-old. Maybe Steve Parish needs to step in to save his manager from taking further punishment. Palace have a fivepoint cushion keeping them above the bottom three, but momentum is against them. They have won just two of their 14 league games since Hodgson left Old Trafford with three points in September. And on Wednesday night, the manager was hounded by fans who couldn’t understand how he could take off Eberechi Eze at Everton with his team needing a goal to stay in the FA Cup.

Arsenal took 11 minutes to shatter the visitors’ flimsy resistance here.

Declan Rice’s corner from the left saw Gabriel get the jump on Palace’s American defender Chris Richards – and his downward header did the rest.

When Saka then saw his flag-kick from the opposite flank sent crashing by Jefferson Lerma against his own crossbar at the far post it was clear that the Gunners were working to a plan.

Sure enough, Saka tested Palace again – and this time Gabriel rag-dolled Richards before seeing his effort bounce home off Henderson’s head with the Palace keeper claiming he had been assaulted by Rice.

Any fight had long since disappeared from the visitors.