Someone should have given me a mask a long time ago, to shut me up

LAST week was the first time I made a concerted effort to wear a mask out for prolonged periods of time.

Whilst NPHET aren’t saying it’s compulsory, except on public transport, they are recommending that people wear them in supermarkets and enclosed spaces.

All I can say is someone should have given me a mask a long time ago, it might have shut me up and prevented me from getting in trouble on many an occasion when my mouth ran away with me.

Because honest to God, I hadn’t the energy to speak after wearing it for an hour. Most of it was spent trying to breathe sufficiently through the blasted thing.

I have the utmost of sympathy for Front Line workers who have had to wear masks from the getgo. It really isn’t easy.

And I know I’ll get used to it, but talk about putting the kybosh on my chat! I made several attempts to engage with people I met but I just gave up in the end, much to their relief I’m sure.

They haven’t completely shut me up though. It didn’t stop me from getting into an altercation with a man in the TK Maxx queue!

There I was, minding my own business when this big fella comes along, jumps the queue and squeezes himself in, right on top of the elderly lady in front of me who looked scared of her life.

Then I stopped minding my own business, which is probably why I end up in these type of situations.

Now it’s hard to look angry when you’re wearing a mask – all you’ve got is your eyes and your eyebrows so I decided to shout to convey my annoyance.

‘You are skipping the queue, the end of it is back there,’ I pointed a few metres back.

His eyes began to bulge, no joke, and he started fingering his rosary beads more frantically. I know, that should have been a dead giveaway!

‘You mind your business, ya ‘aul bag! It’s nuthin’ to do with you.’ He shouted.

I was about to reply ‘well actually it is’ but he was leaning in on top of me, swinging his rosary beads so I thought the better of it and zipped it.

Not before I put my hand up in front of his face. Well look I had a mask on, I had to express how I felt somehow!

It could have gone either way. I’d say he contemplated for a few seconds how he could murder me and dispose of the body but then decided I wasn’t worth the effort. After a few minutes he stormed off to the back of the queue, muttering ‘aul bag’ under his breath.

Cheek of him calling me old!

IT’S HARD TO LOOK ANGRY WHEN YOU’RE WEARING A MASK – ALL YOU’VE GOT IS YOUR EYES AND YOUR EYEBROWS