STRICTLY COME DANCERS

As ‘Strictly’ contestant Laura Whitmore writes for LIFE magazine (see Page 18), Pat Fitzpatrick has a look at some memorable stars of the show

1 BEN COHEN It can’t be easy for someone from a rugby background to go on Strictly. The make-up and costumes and thinly veiled homoeroticism — and that’s just the end-of-season party at the rugby club. Ben spilt from his wife after meeting dancer Kristina Rihanoff on the 2013 show. Apparently Kristina asked to be paired with Daniel O’Donnell last year, to shed her reputation as a maneater. We’re not sure how Daniel felt about that. But we doubt his response included, “That’s great now, so it is”. 2 DANIEL O’DONNELL How come Daniel didn’t write a song about getting voted off Strictly? Seriously, he’s a country-music star who had just experienced heartbreak and a shattered dream. The only thing missing was a broken-down truck. Some felt Daniel would have gone further if he had used routines that featured in his own live shows. Others felt the judges were unlikely to give points for clicking your fingers and winking at a group of pensioners in the front row. 3 NANCY DELL’OLIO Nancy departed the competition in 2011, but not without leaving her mark. On partner Anton’s toes. She is proof that you can’t beat the Italians on the sexy front. Her name means Nancy Of The Oil back at home. Over here, it means ‘I find her a bit hot even though I know she had sex with Sven-Goran Eriksson.’ He was that manager who failed to achieve anything with the England football team. Although that hardly narrows it down. 4 ZOE BALL Forty-five-year-old Zoe was snapped snogging 22-year-old boyband singer, TayTay Starhz, last year. That must be so embarrassing, going around all day with a name like that. It’s like something your mother would say if you came home with a boyband. “Tay tay, stars?”, says she. “Go on sure, have a cup in yeer hand. Who’s for a Coconut Cream, now lads? Come here to me, the next time ye see Louis Walsh, tell him stop fecking about with his hair.” You’d be morto all the same. 5 ANN WIDDECOMBE Ann was described by one of the judges as ‘a dancing hippo’, when she appeared in 2010. Anyone who watched her performance would agree that was a bit harsh. On hippos. Even if they do have two left feet. (Think about it.) Some felt Ann might have trouble fitting in at Strictly, what with all the high camp, bitching and sex scandals. Others worried that she might have found it a bit tame after her time in the Tory party.