WORKING FROM HOME

There are a number of terms used to cover the working-from-home area. They range from e-workers, remote workers and watching Judge Judy with a bowl of Cheerios. The last is on the way out. Why? Evil bosses. It turns out certain companies are monitoring their home-working-employees’ computers, including a check on whether their mouse is in motion. So make sure to put one of the kids at your PC and let them play Candy Crush when you go for a nap.

You’ll need to be careful about your career choice. There are a lot of bad people out there, which is part of the reason you have vowed to never leave the house. If you see an ad on a lamppost that offers three grand a week for working from home, there is a chance it involves a gent from the Balkans called Kaspar who isn’t used to smiling. Let’s just say he isn’t going to arrange a performance review when he discovers you haven’t been moving your mouse. (That’s Kaspar-speak for hiding guns in the jacks.)

And then there’s the loneliness. This might have seemed attractive back in your office days, as you struggled to talk about your commute with Shy Seamus at the coffee dock. (His fidgeting didn’t help.) But the novelty of spending all day alone soon wears off. Just ask a postman. There was a time when they lived in fear of angry pets. Now they dread lonely home-workers, waiting for them at the door every day with, “Ye must be out in all weather, do you get special training for dealing with dogs? Would you like to come in for a cup of tea? Please tell me about your commute to work, I’m going nuts here”.