Little Ripper

The older I get, the more I combine my love of cooking with the needs of my body. I like to think of it as a bespoke service to help resuscitate indolent limbs and fried synapses. If I don’t mainline protein into me by lunchtime, for example, I theatrically expire.

My entire family have comically quick metabolisms. Simple carbs are useless to us — like Harry Potter’s Platform 9¾ , they disappear just as you think they shouldn’t. This is because the stomach likes to hold onto fat and protein for up to six hours, making us feel fuller for longer. Simple carbs, such as white bread and pasta, get metabolised tout de

suite, historically to protect siblings from our sharpening fangs. (simple carbs means you get immediate glucose to the brain, and you feel satiated — albeit temporarily.).

On top of that, an excess of simple carbs prompts the body to store ‘reserves.’ I know, I know — this may sound terribly attractive to spent parents on the tail end of a caffeine deficit and a Paw

Patrol marathon. But in reality, tapping into these reserves takes considerable energy, and they are often stored as a jolly spare tyre around the middle. So beef up on carbs of the complex variety, wholesome fats and protein, dear reader. The world will be a safer place.

OK, let’s get you dosed up. This recipe is a little ripper.