Thalia Heffernan

When I started wearing make-up, it wasn’t really by choice. It was when I started modelling, at 15. People just assume that in that industry your life is easy, that you just go and get your hair and make-up done, pose in front of the camera. For me, what came with that was I had a bit of an identity crisis going through my teens. Because I would go from school straight to work, and I’d be dressed up to portray whatever the client wanted me to look like. So every day was different for me, and I definitely found, as I got older, that I struggled to know what I wanted to look like in my own time. It was a difficult time, but I think now I’m much stronger than I would have been had I not gone through it. Because I know now, at 22, what I want to look like.

I had a phase of not wanting to leave the house without a smoky eye, apart from school and when I was working in Hollister; they’re very strict on no make-up. I remember finding that difficult, because I was heavily self-conscious. I think it was both being a teenage girl, and then knowing my face and my body better than anyone my age, because I’d seen every angle of it through imagery. That brought a lot of self-awareness at a very young age. I remember being too embarrassed to sleep over at friends’ houses because I’d have to take my make-up off. I’ve always had quite big lips, and I hated them when I was younger, so I put foundation all over my mouth because I was like, ‘I don’t look like my friends’.

I had to learn to walk through town with no make-up on, because I’d be going to work to get it done, so I couldn’t arrive with make-up on. You don’t want people to know you’re insecure. I learnt that people care more about what they look like than what you do. Fact. That was a big moment for me. I think, as you get older, self-acceptance sets in. You realise you can put as much make-up on as you want, but you’re not going to change yourself. But that’s fine; I’m fine the way I am.

Everyone has bad days. Sometimes you need to put on a little bit of contouring, or stick a brow on, and hope for the best. And that’s OK.

Now I don’t wear make-up during the day. With my job, I’m a big believer in letting your skin breathe. On my day off, I might wear a pair of sunglasses to hide half my face, and I have the semi-permanent lashes, mainly for work, and then just loads of moisturiser. I think when young girls see people in the media who are starting to accept themselves, that’s the most important thing. Because I didn’t accept myself. I think relatability has become so hard these days. With apps and Photoshop and editing, it’s very hard to look at somebody and go, ‘Yeah, we’re the same’. And we are all the same. I’m still that self-conscious girl, who’s young and naive and a bit scared and wary.

“I remember being too embarrassed to sleep over at friends’ houses because I’d have to take my make-up off ”