Pasta of none
Watching stuff while eating stuff is a favourite pastime of Sophie White, who suggests that the series you’re enjoying greatly informs the accompanying dish
“I posit that the Netflix series has become a form of currency between couples: Netflix dollars”
Time was, there was nothing good on TV. For the first two decades of my life, for example, the stand-out viewing options were Bosco, The
X-Files, My So-Called Life and Six Feet Under. These were all incredible programmes for the time, but we had to wait seven days between instalments, with little else to fill in the gaps, bar a bit of Lovejoy or repeats of The Rockford Files.
It hardly needs mentioning, of course, that now we have become completely spoiled for choice, with on-demand TV and streaming services. This has wrought an interesting development for people in long-term relationships.
If you’re in a relationship, we all know it’s pretty much a given that a large part of your time together is spent watching high-quality American programming. Or arguing about what high-quality American programme to embark on next. I posit that the Netflix series has become a form of currency between couples. Netflix dollars are the back-rub vouchers or the IOUs for domestic chores of the 21st Century.
Last week, in a bid to bank a bit of spousal goodwill — I was abandoning the family for a weekend — I found myself gifting him an unusual proposal.
“I have a surprise for you,” I began. “I have given this a lot of thought, and have generously decided that, while I’m away, you can watch ahead in the series without me.” Watching ahead in the series is now a cardinal sin of most relationships, so this, to my mind, was the equivalent of sanctioned cheating, or, at the very least, a promise to take care of the washing for the next week.
Sadly for me, not all Netflix series are created equal, and the show in question, Ozark, is not worth the same as, say, something like
Master Of None. It’s not that Ozark isn’t good, by the way — it’s excellent. However, one of its main failings in our eyes — Himself and I are two of the greediest people in the world — is that it’s too violent to watch while eating. Pizza just isn’t compatible with hilbilly beefs and roadkill.
Watching stuff while eating stuff is the bedrock upon which our relationship was founded, so I knew in my heart of hearts he would not see much value in my proposal. In contrast, eating while watching Master Of
None, the fantastic Netflix comedy by stand-up Aziz Ansari, is basically a requirement. The show is practically elevated food porn with a side of brilliant comedy, seasoned with a light narrative.
Something easy to make and easy to eat is the best shout, and this classic carbonara is the perfect accompaniment. If you like a twist, I sprinkle mine with toasted hazelnuts.