Emma Thorpe
Emma Thorpe (34) is the founder and chairperson of Jump Autism Support. She used to work in EBS Building Society. Born in Croatia, she came to Ireland in 1997. She lives in Tyrrelstown, Dublin, with her son, Luka (six)
The alarm goes off at 6.30am, and my son, Luka, wakes up at 7am. That gives me a chance to prepare his breakfast, make sure the heating is on, and get his school clothes ready. When he’s up, I give him porridge. I try to have breakfast, but I probably won’t eat until I collect Luka from school. I’m constantly on the go, and I just have cups of coffee through the day. I know that it’s not a good habit.
Luka is the happiest child on planet Earth. We have so much fun together. He is cheeky and full of chat. He is a normal kid, except he has some challenges in certain areas, where he needs extra love and support. He has autism. He is very high functioning, and he attends a mainstream classroom. He was diagnosed at two-and-a-half; at three, he was non-verbal, and now, at six, he is reading books.
Autism changes everything. I had all these plans about how everything was going to be, but then I saw that my child wasn’t developing in the same way as my friends’ kids. Communication was the biggest giveaway — lack of eye contact, and not turning around when you called him. It took a while to accept the diagnosis and start doing something about it. I knew the importance of early intervention, so we got the ball rolling and did it ourselves. We would have been waiting too long for the HSE. With autism, your outlook on life changes; it becomes your life. You go from being a mammy of this little child to being an expert on autism. I never wanted to do this, but I have to do it; it’s a necessity for him to succeed and have a life.
After the school run, I go to Jump, our centre in Rosemount Business Park, Dublin 15. I founded Jump in August 2015. It’s an autism support group, and it’s a not-for-profit organisation. We do social-skills classes, where, in small groups, the kids learn to play, take turns, and along the way, they form friendships. It’s fun, it’s play-based and we have professionals working with them. We also have Lego, karate, fit-kid classes and we have kickboxing for the parents, so they can let off steam. That’s important. In Jump, kids with autism get to have a normal, fun childhood. It also gives parents a break, and they can spend time with their other kids.
Jump came out of my own need; once Luka was diagnosed, we were doing all these therapies privately — social skills, speech therapy, occupational therapy. They were costing a small fortune, but I thought, ‘Where does he put them into practice?’ I didn’t want to put him into a neurotypical environment, because he wasn’t ready for it. He would stand out.
When he had playdates with my friends’ kids, he wasn’t able to form friendships. He was an outsider, completely in his own world. It was difficult for me to watch this, and my friends couldn’t understand because they weren’t going through it. I decided that I was going to do something about it. There are a lot of autism charities that do days out, but we can do that as a family. I needed Luka to belong to a group, and to have friends. Kids with autism don’t want to be alone, they want friendships, but they don’t know how to go about forming them. They might be too boisterous, and they don’t know how to interact properly. Jump started out as a summer camp, and it went from there. We fundraised like mad, and used that money to pay for everything. To keep it going, we fundraise all the time. I don’t get paid.
Every December, we run a Christmas party in Tyrrelstown Community Centre. Christmas can be one of the worst times for children with autism. Lots of parents try to bring their kids to shopping centres to see Santa Claus, but this can be very challenging. Being stuck in traffic on the way will have them in a bad way. Kids with autism have more anxiety than your average child; they can be sensitive to the noise, bright lights, music and the crowds. These sensory problems actually cause them pain. Then expecting them to stand still in a queue is too much. These kids need lots of movement because they have more energy and they need to let it out.
Our Christmas party is autism-friendly; the noise is down to a minimum, there are no flashing lights, no queues to see Santa, and we even have a sensory room, if the kids need to be quiet. We also have bouncy castles, so they can let off steam. All of these things prevent meltdowns. And the siblings are welcome too; it’s a happy Christmas experience. We fundraise for this every year, and for all of our services all year round.
I’m Croatian. My roots and my life experience form who I am; they made me able for anything. I came to Ireland in 1997 with my parents after the war. I was 12. They wanted to give me a better future. In Croatia, I saw people being killed. I was hungry, but even at nine, I understood not to ask my parents for food because they didn’t have any. When you’ve experienced hardships like that, autism is a piece of cake.
I don’t like pity. If something happens to you, you’re in control. Change it and make the best out of it: that’s always been my mindset. That feeds into autism and Jump. This government was failing my child, but I’m not going to fail him. I decided to put things into place. I said, ‘I can do it and I am able to do it myself ’. I found the HSE services insulting, so I left. Now the HSE recommends Jump.
In conversation with Ciara Dwyer
“Christmas is very difficult for kids with autism. The noise and the bright lights cause pain”