‘It’s very sad seeing near-empty churches at funerals these days’
COVID-19 HAS CHANGED HOW WE DEAL WITH DEATH
THE Covid-19 pandemic is changing how people are dealing with death and it may have repercussions for how people go about grieving their loved ones, according to one well known Mid- Cork undertaker.
Martin Fitzgerald is the seventh generation of his family to work in the undertaking business in Macroom in Co Cork but he’s never seen anything like the impact Covid-19 is having on how people deal with death.
“We’re undertaking here in Macroom since 1824 so we would have buried people during the Famine and the Spanish flu – I’m in the business since the early 1960s but I’ve never seen anything like the impact Covid-19 is having.”
Mr Fitzgerald and his son, Billy, have been involved in organising several funerals since the HSE published guidelines on social distancing which the Diocese of Cloyne has advised people to follow for funerals.
Rosaries and the public lying of the deceased in repose at funeral homes has gone with the Diocese of Cloyne recommending the remains only be brought to the church on the day of interment and only family and close friends attend.
“The last number of funerals we’ve conducted, we’ve hardly had more than 25 mourners in attendance. We did a funeral this week and of the 25 mourners in attendance, I would reckon only three were people outside the family circle.
“And, of course, shaking hands and hugging and embracing to sympathise is all gone by the board because of the danger of spreading the infection so funerals now are a very different experience to what they were even a month ago.
“It’s eerie –that’s the only word I can use to describe it – it’s very sad seeing near empty churches and small huddles of people in cemeteries - it’s difficult on the family and you would feel for them.”
In many cases, the family is not putting the death notice in the papers or on RIP.ie until after the funeral has taken place or if they do publish a death notification prior to burial, they say the funeral is private as per HSE guidelines. “Family tributes to their loved one at funeral are gone as is signing books of condolences and even something as traditional as shouldering the coffin which is an important part of the ritual is gone because of social distancing.
“We’re fortunate here in Macroom in that most of our cemeteries are modern ... we can drive the hearse well into the cemetery and then maybe use a trolley if necessary to bring the coffin to the graveside.”
The Irish funeral is now more akin to a private funeral with small attendances and he believes it can add to the stress for those already grieving the loss of a loved one.
Photo: Michael Mac Sweeney/Provision
“I think we like social funerals – what we have now are much smaller though still very dignified funerals but I think people like the acknowledgement of loss that happens when there’s more than just the family involved.
“I think that sort of coming out of the community to rally around and offer support and sympathy helps people through the grieving process and that’s not happening now even
though people are doing their best.
“We had one funeral this week and although people didn’t go to the church or to the graveyard in line with the advice, they just gathered in small clusters at fixed points on the road to the cemetery to pay their respects.
“People are almost doing it naturally and it could become the norm – how we deal with death is definitely changing as a result of Covid-19.”