Peugeot’s ‘mini trojan’ workhorse

Chris is still basking in his post-vacation feelgood glow... so Peugeot couldn’t have picked a better time for him to review its nippy new SUV

Peugeot 2008 GT Line BlueHDi

Hurrah for the wondrous new research claiming the residual joy, euphoria and feel-good glow of a successful week’s holiday can stick around for up to a month after the flip-flops and factor 50 have been launched back into the top cupboard. If true, this is indeed brilliant news.

However, there is no mention of how this most welcome post-jolly-bobs period of upbeat positivity and contentment might eventually come to an end. This is the worry that’s currently eating into the post-Cornwall (five days) and post-Portugal (two days for a mate’s wedding) cool groove I now realise I am entitled to. Will it be like a suntan, gradually fading hour by hour, or will it suddenly do a bunk overnight and vanish all at once? I need to know, not so I can cease fretting and get back to glowing, but so I can warn my kids, colleagues and wifey of Grumpy Bear’s imminent return.

For now, though, my 50-yearold (grump-free) mojo seems to have been palpably revitalised. It can breathe again. Probably because I’ve stopped thinking about the things thinking has no effect on. Like the fact that the world is no longer manageable, because we all know far too much about each other’s business. Or the fact that smartphones, home delivery and packaging are obviously accelerating the extinction of the human race via sloth (as predicted by the Chinese thousands of years ago), yet we seem to be doing zip all to halt their onslaught. Or that the doommongering of 24-hour rolling news continues to brainwash us into being too scared to open the fridge for fear of who might jump out.

Is this misappropriation of priorities really what people fought and died for in World Wars I and II?

The point is, I feel on extremely good form at the moment, seeing nothing but wonder wherever I gaze. Look at what delights super September has on offer for example: Poldark, Victoria, Cold Feet, Bake Off, Strictly, The Goodwood Revival, The Paralympics, The Ryder Cup, The US Open tennis final (today!) – not to mention my mum’s 91st birthday. What’s not to like among that prize basket of glistening cherries.

All of which means only one thing as far as this week’s review is concerned: Peugeot, you could not have picked a better time to send me such an average car. Right now, I have zero interest in sticking the boot into anything. Which is why I set my mechanic mate Tim loose on the 2008 GT Line instead. I did drive the car (and loved it) but was all too aware the discerning critic in me was still miles away, queuing up for his fantasy fifth pasty in Cornwall.

However, there is more to confess: Tim also holds a quiet torch of partiality towards this new ‘Pug’, as we were loaned this very car as a back-up vehicle for our Children In Need festival, CarFest. Tim raved about its load capacity, mainly thanks to the rear seats folding down dead flat. It easily swallowed up all the various toolkits, batteries and fuel and oil cans required when ‘classic’ cars are involved. He also noted negligible power loss with the added extra weight. So, a mini-Trojan as well as a mini crossover SUV. That’s the good news. Here’s what he didn’t like: That its only real claim to being an SUV at all is that it has a bulkier body and higher ground clearance than a standard hatchback – ‘It’s not even four-wheel drive!’ he protested. ‘And don’t get me started on the handbrake...’ Here I agree with him. Very much form over function, I’m afraid. It does look cool but it did catch – a lot.

He also took umbrage over the combination of ‘too many’ interior finishes. He said it reminded him of Citroën’s mishmash style, which it did me too, which is why I liked it. I’ve always thought the French can get away with such things. Look at the way they over-hang the walls of their already claustrophobic bistros with entirely incongruous huge clusters of art. He also hated the peanut-size steering wheel and aloof instrument cluster, whereas, again, I enjoyed both.

We disagreed again when it

came to performance. I thought the 2008 was surprisingly nippy and responsive, he thought it sluggish and tank-like. Perhaps something to do with the fact I regularly drive a Land Rover whereas Tim’s garage boasts a stunning ’65 Mustang. Which may be the same reason he observed the clutch as being ‘over light’, and any thoughts regarding the clutch whatsoever escaped me entirely.

I should mention I drove this car a lot with my kids, which I realise means I automatically like whatever I’m in, regardless of its pros and cons.

That said, when pushed, even tough Tim gave it a reluctant thumbsup: ‘It’s a pretty well-equipped, extremely comfy, surprisingly roomy, great value-for-money, fairly economical, bijou family workhorse.’

A sunny verse, then, with which to conclude this week’s sunniest of columns. Probably due to Tim basking in the afterglow of a tryst in France with his French mademoiselle, Melody.

A parting note to any other manufacturers with pretty average cars about to come to market that might well benefit from a sympathetic review – get them over to Tim and me ASAP. Presently, we are putty in your hands. But be quick, Grumpy Bear is never more than a cracked jar of honey away.