SMOKES & DAGGERS

A mischievous mix of (mostly) news

ENDA KENNY took a break from all that boring budgetary stuff to attend Fine Gael’s annual London fundraiser in Cricklewood on Friday. Sadly, the event was marred by a rather stark decline in the number of tables taken to hear the wit and wisdom of Enda at a mere €100 a head when compared to the preelection jamboree of 2015. Failure, alas, is an orphan.

COMMENTATING on Thursday night’s home win for the Republic of Ireland, former Liverpool and Ireland great Ronnie Whelan showed medicine wasn’t his strongest suit. Speaking about defender Shane Duffy’s serious freak injury a number of years ago – where he had to be rushed from the field to hospital and had his spleen removed – Ronnie, pictured, forgot the specifics. ‘Was it his liver?’ he asked regarding the removal, despite the fact that you can’t live without a liver. It was left to George Hamilton to move things on: ‘It was an internal organ anyway.’

THE Conservative Party conference was a scary affair. But there was at least a moment of levity among the ‘foreigners out’ vibe emanating from Birmingham. Going with the general global trend towards populism, Welsh conservative leader Andrew Davies tripped upon a solid idea when he told conference ‘We will make breakfast… Brexit… a success.’ Politics always was about taking home the bacon. IN AUGUST, the leader of Norway’s Liberal Party, Trine Skei Grande, was caught on camera playing Pokemon Go during a committee meeting. Skip ahead to this week and Prime Minister Erna Solberg is spotted doing the same during a debate in parliament. It’s okay, though, Ms Grande was speaking at the time. ‘She heard what I said, we ladies can do two things at the same time you

know,’ Ms Grande tweeted. CONGRATULATIONS to Fine Gael’s Michelle Mulherin, pictured, for the magnificently headlined press release that landed in Smokes’s inbox during the week: ‘Slurry spreading deadline must be extended past current closing date.’ Or she’ll kick up a stink, no doubt.