Feeney family’s forgiveness of IRA killer a lesson to us all

IT was the 30th anniversary of the killing of their sister that spurred the Feeney family into action, generating an unprecedented move by the IRA, and an act of forgiveness and remembrance that points the way forward. Kathleen Feeney, 14, was one of eight children killed by the IRA during the troubles in 1973-5. Others were killed by loyalists and the security forces.

Initially the IRA claimed the Derry girl was killed by the British army. They even ‘retaliated’ by shooting three soldiers the next day in her name. It was only at the inquest into Kathleen’s death that the family began having doubts about who killed her. Rumours flew about who pulled the trigger, but still the IRA denied ending her life.

This month, and every November, is difficult for Kathleen’s family. Her anniversary was on the 14th and their mother died in 2000, not knowing who killed her daughter.

But the remarkable journey undertaken by the three surviving members of Kathleen’s family has, in the words of Harry Feeney, ‘made me a much better person by having the will to forgive and forget’.

The family wrote a series of dignified letters to Martin McGuinness – IRA commander in Derry at the time of the killing – listing five demands. They wanted to know the events leading to her death; why soldiers were shot in her name; why prisoners in Long Kesh were told the army had killed her; a public apology, and the opportunity to meet her killer.

The Feeney family were, in many ways, typical of working class northern Catholic families: impoverished, badly treated, second-class citizens who waited years for decent accommodation. They were the kind of people the IRA and Sinn Féin claim to represent.

Initially ignored, the family eventually got the first public apology from the IRA. They admitted the killing: it was an accident they claimed, she was caught in crossfire. Efforts by Harry Feeney to meet the killer were rebuffed. Then a bizarre sequence of events, which he has outlined in a powerful book, led to the man making contact. The family had discovered he had an association with a movie being shown at the Foyle Film Festival.

In November 2005, they unsuccessfully tried to have the film postponed as it was being shown on Kathleen’s anniversary. However, it did at last prompt the man to contact Harry. They met near Knock in Co. Mayo shortly afterwards.

The IRA man had admitted the killing to the RUC but, in his own words, ‘he beat the rap’ and was acquitted. He got seven years for possessing firearms – he was only 16 at the time!

Harry Feeney shook the hand of the man who pulled the trigger and killed his sister. The man – who remains anonymous and lives in the south – apologised to the family. He also confided to them that his children were unaware of his past.

As we know, not many of the relatives of the almost 4,000 victims of the Troubles have been able, or allowed, to travel the same road as the Feeneys. They should be allowed to, if it is their wish.

There is no end to our forgetting, but dignified remembrance and openness can lead to some closure for grieving families.

Harry Feeney’s book, The 14th November, is available online.